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infitsovermisfits · 2 years ago

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What's Shakin' Baby? - Eddie Munson x GN!Reader

((i'm crying sm look how pretty he fucking looks AAAAAA))

info: took me days to write which I'm honestly pretty proud of- I had this idea for a while and just thought it was cute lads :) hope u enjoy while I work on the other fics. OMG VOL 2 COMES OUT IN A WEEK WHAT THE FUCK??? That's wild I'm so nervous and excited. this is edited but if I missed any warnings or anything woopsie. I also hope people are ok that I change readers home life around? like in 'Tiny Swords' they've got a family but here they're alone- I'm just trying to be fun with it and change things up for u all please appreciate me please please validate this please please (/lh) HAHAHAHA HAPPY READING!!!

also, i have s o many pictures of eddie on my pinterest its so fucking funny. also, if anyone's going to comic con on the 8/10th of July and seeing Joe i hope u have a lovely time <3

WARNINGS: gender neutral reader, reader is 20, angst, self-conscious issues, underage (America) drinking, drug use, mentions of violence, allusions to season 3, fighting, working through issues ig, angst with a happy ending, reconciliation, confession of feelings, way too long oh my god, idk what else my mind is blank

PART 1 | PART 2 | PART3 | MASTERLIST

11,979 words

"Sorry, we're closed!" You called, focusing on drying the blenders from any leftover water droplets that remained from the night before. It was bright and early at 7 am, and the ringing of the door behind you signified without fail that a customer had entered 'Sam's Smoothie Shack' without bothering to spare a glance at the "Sorry! We're closed!" sign hung on the door. The chart next to it clearly stated that on Mondays, you opened at 7:30 am, not 7 on the dot. You'd gotten the job last year during spring break, and worked part-time when you had school. After your exams, you worked full-time over the summer to make some more money before leaving Hawkins for good, to go to Franklin College...

You were back now, finally finished with your first semester there, and it was... Vastly underwhelming. Sure, you were happy- and perhaps too eager- to finally leave Hawkins behind and experience life as the adult you were. Yeah... Only no one told you how fucking difficult making new friends in a city you had never been in before was going to be. You'd basically lived alone since you were sixteen, so you knew the basics of taking care of yourself. That was nothing you were new to, you just had an issue talking to people. How were you supposed to start conversations? Introducing yourself was weird, and most of the 'normal' people there were judgemental assholes...

Your roommates were nice to you but rarely invited you out to parties. There were a few other goths and punks who studied there but to your luck, you didn't share any classes together, so you rarely saw them. That meant you were often drinking alone by yourself in your dorm, reminiscing on the not-as-shitty-as-you remembered times in Hawkins...

Your whole life, you felt alone, never really fitting in with the other kids. The friends you did have grew into assholes by High School- being alone was better than being talked about behind your back or never included in plans. It made you resent them until it made you a loner. But if you stayed out of everybody's way then you'd be safe, right?

You couldn't be more fucking wrong. It was as if you had 'make this person's life hell' floating above you at all times. Kids, you didn't even know would call you a freak or shove you in the halls. Some days, surviving those 4 years seemed agonising and pointless to you...

At least one person was determined to prove you wrong.

Eddie "The Freak" Munson was the only person you had some sort of a relationship with in Hawkins. When one day, you'd found your lunch being ripped to shreds in the field by some assholes, you ran all the way to the trees, sobbing into your hands. Out of the forest, he emerged, leaves stuck in his shorter hair and round eyes full of worry. He had been the first person to be kind in High School, and that made you admire him so much.

He hadn't called you a freak- he called the dog collar you turned into a bracelet cool and not weird, and he even shared one of his sandwiches with you. That day, in the first week of freshman year, you decided he was going to be your only friend.

Over the years, you watched him grow into himself Eddie: becoming the intense, animated and overconfident 'freak' at your high school that taught you how to grow thicker skin. By junior year, you'd developed your own catalogue of insults you'd hurl at anyone trying to give you a hard time, and laughed maniacally at the 'devil worshipping' rumours they'd spread about the two of you.

If only they knew what you were actually like alone. Eddie was much more laid back, no thanks to the weed he began dealing to anyone who'd be interested greatly helped in relaxing you both. It also jumbled your words and made Hawkins just that more bearable. Through the long summers, you found yourself spending more and more time with him, until you were hanging out every day. If you weren't at work, you were most likely with Eddie- in his van, in his trailer, in your trailer, in the park at Forest Hills, in the woods, wherever. Legal, or illegal it didn't matter because you were there together.

You largely credited him as being the only reason you managed to survive high school and Hawkins in their own ways- existing with him wasn't as shitty as existing alone. He somehow made things more enjoyable. And you'd be lying if you didn't think about kissing him once, maybe twice. You really would give anything just to feel those soft lips against your own... Once...

You lost your chance when you'd received your Franklin acceptance letter and he broke the news to you that they'd called his Uncle Wayne to inform him Eddie had failed his exams and would need to stay behind another year. And you had to bury that anger deep within you and comfort him through chainsmoking and drinking through the rest of your summer together, considering you'd be gone for most of the year.

For the first time in your life, you were separated. And going to college without Eddie by your side was weird in itself. Sure you'd likely be taking separate classes- maybe he wouldn't even be studying at all? Maybe he'd work, or play with a new band he'd find up there... He'd find some way to fit into your life together... But he didn't. Because he wasn't there. He stayed behind while you moved on.

And yet you came back. You knew you could have stayed in Franklin for the summer but where was the fun in that? The one friend you had made that had a very believable fake ID was gone for the summer so you couldn't drink your way through the sweltering heat. You were sort of forced to hop on the next bus to Hawkins, heaving your luggage after you and staring out the window as Metalica drowned out any worries you may have of stepping back home... Home... Didn't fucking feel like it,

"That's a shame," You recognised that voice. You'd had it making small comments that made you smile to yourself in class, and lulling you to sleep with his songs, " 'I was made for loving you, baby...' " He was behind you now. He tapped the bell three times to the beat of the song as you turned up your Kiss song on the radio by your side. You turned sharply with a large grin,

" 'You were made for loving me...' " You finished excited in unison with him, barely on key from how wide you were grinning at the sight of him: long, raven-black mane of hair cascading down his shoulders and covering some of the pins higher up on his jean vest, sitting just on top of the warm leather jacket who's scent and touch you had long committed to memory. You could faintly see the red devil beneath the layers, and you could only make out the 'i' with the flaming dot from the 'Hellfire Club' printed over his chest. He was live and in the flesh before you. Finally, together again, "Hey!" You greeted happily, unable to control the laughter that bubbled up from your chest as you moved forwards to the counter. Quickly, you hopped up on it and slid over the smooth top, ignoring the 'Hey, I just cleaned that!' from your younger co-worker as you fell into his arms, hugging him tightly. His familiar scent of cigarette smoke and weed quickly filled your lungs, warmly welcoming you back. Strangely, you could also faintly smell cologne on him; you'd tease him about that later. For now, you were just happy you were reunited, "God, did I miss you, Munson," You grinned, pulling away in his arms to look up at him, "Did your hair get longer when I was gone?" You teased playfully, twirling a strand around your finger,

"You missed me!?" He asked in a mocking shocked tone, causing you to laugh, "And yeah, it did. Hair grows like that," You grinned,

"I had no clue, Eddie," You said playfully, smirking, "But you didn't even cut it or anything-"

"Who's that?" Your co-worker asked from behind you. He'd turned the music down, which caused you to turn and frown at his confused face, "Is he here for the interview?"

"No man, he's just my very... Good friend," You let go of Eddie from where you were holding him and pat his shoulder with a tight smile, glancing up at him and walking back around behind the counter, tightening the bow at the back of your apron, "It's Eddie? Munson?" You told your coworker, motioning to the man inside the store, "I told you about him, Micheal," You sighed,

"Yeah, well, Sam said if it's not part of the official training, I don't have to listen to you," You rolled your eyes as his voice droned on and he turned back to cutting up a few more fruits for the healthier smoothies,

"See what I gotta deal with on a daily basis, Eds?" You smiled as you leaned against the counter, glancing down at it briefly and grabbing a spray and a wipe, cleaning it,

"Mh- just as awful as last time," He gave you a wink once you were done, and leaned an elbow on the counter so he could talk to you as usual. Things felt normal again- as normal as Eddie could provide you,

"Hey, I like this job," You defended,

"You tolerate this job, barely," He smirked. He knew you too damn well, and you gave him a knowing smile,

"Yeah. I do," You sighed, "But it pays me money to work here. And Sam's nice enough to let me wear my apron again a-"

"Hey, where is the old man, by the way?" Eddie asked, and you glanced around cautiously, before looking up at the newly installed security camera that had gotten busted when some middle schoolers thought it would be funny to construct the most repulsive smoothie known to man at you. Without pay. You didn't have the heart to let Sam know so you just prayed Micheal would fuck it up somehow, "Did he uh...?" Eddie made a cutthroat gesture when you turned back to look at him, and you smirked, shoving his hand away,

"Sam is right as rain, thank you very much for your concern," You smiled at the disappointed groan he gave, and reached over grabbing a toothpick and sticking it between his teeth, chewing on it to relieve a nicotine craving he likely had, "He's in the back doing inventory and helping the boys unload- we get fresh fruit here every day, after all," You tapped the sign that you had drawn, that now rested before the register. Eddie hummed, looking over your work with a small nod, "He still very much doesn't appreciate you loitering around," You teased, smiling at him, "But you're A-Okay in my books, Munson," You grinned at him, resting your elbows on the counter and setting your chin on your hands, "So how've you-"

"Why is he still inside then?" Your co-worker asked, unamused, and unsharing your excitement. You cast him a glare for even piping up, "Wait, is this the guy we're not supposed to let-"

"Because I can be," Eddie piped up from beside you, "And if you tell that old ass I was here, I'll punch you," Eddie threatened. Eddie had only ever been punched. You'd never personally seen him fight back; usually he'd just pick himself off the floor and go scowling to you with a bloody nose you'd clean for him, or a black eye you'd lend your ice to. You smirked, raising your brows at him,

"You actually can't be in here though," The younger kid said, moving to stand closer to you, "The sign says we're still closed. We open in fifteen minutes," When you came back two days ago, you couldn't sleep. You arrived at Forest Hills Trailer Park at the asscrack of dawn and spent the better part of that morning digging through your stuff to find your fake ID you'd wrongfully misplaced before leaving for college. Soon though, you wouldn't need it. Your twenty-first was only a few months away. God, you were old...

��The first thing you did was buy yourself beer because Jesus Christ was the summer looking warm as shit. You then went to Sam's to reclaim your apron, only to find your spot taken by Micheal. You didn't know or recognise him- he was either a junior or senior but you weren't paying attention to what he was saying because his voice pissed you off. All mumbly and gross it made you want to rip off your ears. Sam had been convinced he was the best for the job so you didn't question him, and felt relieved to be hired again.

Micheal, like you, couldn't give a shit about this job, or you. Something you were thankful for. You mostly treated him like an annoying little brother, and rarely spoke to him because you really had nothing in common. He seemed so boring to you, so it greatly surprised you that he was the reason you were getting so many, customers. It was amusing, even now, seeing the line of newly 'Smoothie Cleanse' obsessed moms of Hawkins flocking outside and sending Eddie dirty looks for cutting inside. Micheal would get flirted with constantly, only to obliviously blink and just make the smoothie, while you only received death glare looks. It didn't really matter, considering you two shared the generous tips he'd receive at the end of your shifts,

"Shut up, Micheal," You said, waving him off, "Hey- I just remembered I never taught you how to clean the blenders because it's 'unsafe' so you've gotta go in the back to ask Sam," You said, pointing out the blender. He picked it up, frowning,

"But-" You didn't want to argue,

"You want our customers complaining about our dirty blenders, Micheal?" You asked, and watched his eyes widen fearfully, "You want this place to shut down and ruin poor Sam's life? No. You don't. Get your ass in the back, find Sam, asking how to take the blender apart," You said threateningly, watching as he disappeared through the 'employee's only' door. You sighed, turning back to Eddie and grabbing a smoothie you'd made earlier for yourself in place of coffee, "How've you been, Eds?" You asked, smiling at him as you took a sip from your straw,

"Oh, you know, here and there," He said, "Everywhere really. You drink this crap?" He gestured to the drink you were holding, "Thought you'd be sick of it," He hummed,

"I was," You shrugged, taking a sip, "But this raspberry blast is so good," You hummed, handing it over to him so he could take a sip of the pink liquid, "I made it myself. Created the recipe and everything- it's part of the hiring process I told you about? Apparently, it's super popular now. I think Sam's even gonna call it the Smoothie of the Summer which means-" You tapped the counter eagerly, "-I get a promotion!" You grinned,

"Nice!" He smiled, holding his hand out for you to high five, before taking another sip, "I finished this by the way- sorry," He said, shaking the empty cup, "It's really good,"

"I told you!" You grinned, watching him toss the cup and miss the trash bin entirely, "You pick that up right now, we're not even open and you're making a mess," You pointed to the cup with a grin,

"Mmmh- can't I'm still tasting the smoothie," He said, closing his eyes as you grinned,

"Christ, Eds," You hummed, shaking your head as you glanced through the fresh ingredients in the cooling trays next to you,

"What's in there? I can taste the raspberries but it's sweet and not weird like raspberries usually are," He said with a frown,

"You mean tart. They're tart," You explained, and watched as he blinked at you,

"Like a pie tart?" You laughed loudly, shaking your head, "You put a pie in there?"

"No!" You laughed, "No, you dumbass- tart is like a flavour it's not entirely sour but it's not sweet it's like... Between those uh-" You glanced behind you at the overhead menus, "It's got raspberries, obviously, but they're the frozen ones cause we have to get rid of them before Sam orders anymore," You said, glancing at the ingredients set out and pointing to them, "It's also got banana and yoghurt to give it the thick texture, apple juice to help it blend and make it sweet and then also honey. For the sweetness," You smiled, "You do have to tweak and really experiment with the ratios because one thing goes off and it's just gross and too sour or gross and too sweet," You stuck your tongue out,

"I see, I see," He said, resuming his spot where he was leaning against the counter. He had pulled the toothpick from his mouth and was dulling the sharp ends by repeatedly drumming the stick into the counter, "It's nice. Refreshing, babe," He teased, and you rolled your eyes, "Oh and by the way- fuck you for not telling me you were back sooner," He said in mock hurt, putting a hand on his chest. Your eyes widened at his comment,

"Fuck- Shit- Sorry," You hissed, "I know I should have, I'm really sorry," You quickly apologised, "I didn't expect coming back home after so long was gonna be so chaotic but..." You sighed deeply, then shrugged your shoulders "It is," You frowned, "I had to go pay off some bills to Dave 'cause apparently I only paid for six months and not ten," You rambled,

"Oh shit," He said with a frown, looking concerned,

"Yeah, shit," You grumbled, "I was so excited to go buy new clothes for myself tomorrow at Starcourt and bam!- half my savings are gone," You frowned, "Gotta compromise if I want to eat and survive or look nice," You sighed,

"He knows you live alone, right?" He checked; you nodded, "And that you're a student going to college in another city, how many miles from home?"

"Yeah, of course he knows," You said, glancing over at the fruits you had paused in cutting up to dry the blenders. You glanced over to where you kept the single-use plastic gloves and put on a pair, before resuming your task, "He doesn't give a shit about students, though. He's never heard of a student discount," You grumbled,

"He knows you're only twenty, right?" You nodded, "You've been living there for eight years with your parents- three of those alone. He must have... Realised?" He said quietly, and you paused with the knife half sunk in the strawberry.

To be honest, you didn't want to bother Dave with the news your father, your only caretaker, had passed when he did, so all the bills you'd paid for those three years were marked out in his name. You'd secretly hoped someone else would tell him to avoid having that conversation. You never really got used to admitting to what happened with your father; his sickness... His death. Eddie and his uncle Wayne were the only ones you had that day, and you spent the week over there, not ready to enter your home and realise you were alone,

"...Yeah," You said quietly, resuming your task,

"Then why don't you ask him to lower the rent?" He asked, leaning against the glass display and watching the movements of your hands intently, "Considering you're not even using it as a home while you're away in college,"

"Ugh, that was his point too," You frowned,

"But you're not using his stuff? Why is he charging you if you're not there?" He frowned,

"He said something like..." You paused to think, remembering back to the conversation you had "Something like 'doesn't matter to me that you can't pay- you're hogging up the space, kiddo'," You mimicked the older man's voice and sighed, "He's annoying and stubborn and he hates kids," You settled,

"Damn..." Eddie sighed, "You should have told me. I could have covered for you," He said, and you smiled softly at his offer,

"Thanks, Eds that's very kind of you," You said sincerely, and noticed the small smile he flashed you made your heart flutter, "But four months' worth of rent is a lot. And I don't think you could magically pull that much out of thin air" You said, eyes widening slightly. You shook your head "Just gotta spend my summer vacationing away from school work with... Normal work," You grimaced,

"Damn," He frowned,

"Anyhow-" You tried steering the conversation away from your boring life to him. He was bound to have something exciting to tell you, "Anything new with you?" You asked,

"A few freshmen joined Hellfire," He said, as you 'ooo'-ed for him, "Yes, yes. My illustrious charm and endless charisma convinced them to join," You smiled, at his comments as he waved his arm for dramatic purposes,

"You kick their asses yet, babe?" You smiled, glancing up at him from your task,

"Of course, babe, who do you think I am?" You could still remember the first night you started using the pet names for each other. One night, you were getting high in his room, giggling away at something, when he had mentioned his 'sweetheart'. He perhaps sensed your mood shift to serious all too quickly, because your giggles had faded and you were staring at him with a curious look. He lifted his hand above his head to affectionately strum the chords on his then, brand new guitar, which got you to laugh again. You'd started calling each other babe that night and it stuck. It was a friend thing, you were convinced. As playfully as asshole, shithead and dickhead were. But sometimes, you liked pretending there was affection behind the word, and not your usual playfulness,

"Good," You hummed softly. You still had a full bowl of freshly cleaned strawberries to get through, before opening time. When he didn't speak again, seemingly focused on your hands working away at slicing up the fruit, you spoke up, "You know how much I fucking love making shakes for the health moms out there?" You said sarcastically, nodding your head to the line of mostly older women queuing impatiently outside,

"Mhm," He hummed, scanning the line, "Yeah, I'm so jealous of em," He joked, making you breathe out a small laugh, "What did you want to get from Starcourt anyway?" He asked curiously,

"Huh?" You asked, not entirely hearing him,

"I asked what you wanted from Starcourt. The mall?" He elaborated,

"I don't know- anything that caught my eye?" You said with a smile, before sighing, "You know I couldn't afford much last year, considering I was putting the money off for rent and school... It was mostly window shopping then, so I'm excited to go now to actually buy stuff! I have my route planned out already- Sam's even letting taking the day off tomorrow so I can maximise on the buying and he hates the mall! I'm so excited, Eds- Wanna hear?" You said quickly, letting your excitement take over before he could utter a word, "Okay so bottom floor, West wing entrance, straight into JCPennies because there was such a cute necklace there that I think if I layered with-"

"I... Hate to disappoint you but uh..." Eddie said quickly, holding a hand up for you, "The mall burned down," You blinked, setting the knife down as you stared at him,

"It did what?"

"Faulty wiring, I think? If I remember it from the news right... I don't know, my uncle read the paper but he might have burned it..." He said, humming to himself and tilting his head, eyes flicking over the ceiling to try to gather his thoughts, "The ceiling was unsafe and collapsed onto gas pipes and then boom! A fire," He said. Your shoulders dropped in disappointment as you frowned, looking at the pink-stained cutting board and knife. God, it sure had been a while since you were back home... Seems like the most exciting things happened while you were away, "But hey- the stores on the main street were forced to open back up, so that's... Good! You could always go there to shop," He said quickly, seeing your mood shift,

"Nah, that's not the same as walking through a mall," You sighed, "That's... Wow that's so shitty," You huffed, frowning, "So now I just have a day to... Do nothing?" You frowned, shaking your head as you went back to your task,

"You've always got me," Eddie said. You looked up at him, scanning him up and down, "Wherever you wanna go, I'll take you," He smiled, and you narrowed your eyes,

"How are you not burning up in that?" You pointed to his two jackets and long sleeve Hellfire shirt,

"You guys have good air con," He winked, and you raised your brows with a nod,

"We do have good air con," You smiled, "But outside?"

"Well, it's only warm. Not unbearably hot yet," He said, and you nodded, before sighing and dumping the pile of strawberries into their correct, chilled bin,

"If Sam sees you in here-"

"He'll be overjoyed!" Eddie grinned as he finished, "Now come on- hang out with me all day tomorrow. School's out for the summer, you have nothing to do; I have nothing to do. I'll make it worthwhile! Promice. I'll take you around Hawkins and show you everything that's different," He begged, and you sighed as you moved to set the dirty dishes in the nearby sink,

"That's not gonna take us all day though," You said, and watched him pout, "It might take all evening though," You smiled," I get off at one today," You told him, and watched his face as he smiled in recognition,

"Of course you get off at one today," He grinned, "Nice- I'll pick you up for lunch and we'll go driving around like old times," He said eagerly,

"Hell, why not?" You grinned as he hissed a little 'yes' to himself, "I-"

"You could always just come in tomorrow," Your co-worker piped in, seemingly appearing out of nowhere and scaring you. You twisted around to see him holding the now spotless blender, and cast him a glare, "And tell Sam your plans got cancelled,"

"Or you could keep your mouth shut and wash those blenders a little better," You snapped back, holding a hand up to Eddie and sliding off the sticky gloves you were wearing, discarding them in a nearby bin "What the fuck is that?" You said, grabbing one of the blenders and holding it out to him to see the blades.

"...I don't know," He said quietly,

"That-" You pointed inside, "-is peanut butter stuck to the blades," You said, "You better clean this right now-"

"But it's been through the dishwasher," He whined, "Can't we say it's... Clean?" You glared at him,

"Fine, Micheal. Don't clean it," You said, setting the blender and throwing up your hands, "But when you use this blender to make a smoothie for a customer who's got a severe peanut allergy and they fall to the ground unable to breathe and die-" You said angrily, "-You are gonna be singlehandedly paying out lawsuits," You threatened, shoving the blender into his chest and sighing as he moved into the back, "Unbelievable," You shook your head as you approached Eddie, leaning your arms on the counter. He seemed stunned, staring at you with an unreadable look on his face, "What? What is it?" You asked, standing up straighter,

"Y-" He cleared his throat, "You're very uhm... Serious about your job," He said, giving you a small smile. You tilted your head as you looked at him, furrowing your brows,

"Yeah...? I am. I gotta make money and I can't do that if this establishment is paying off hospital bills..." You rambled, noticing the slight pink tinge to his cheeks and smiling softly, "Eds, are you blushing...?" You asked surprised, and stifled a small laugh as his eyes widened,

"No- You know what, babe? I'm actually- I'm late for a Hellfire club meeting!" He said, glancing from the watch on his wrist up to the clock above you reading 7:30 am. It was a warm July day- school was out for the summer- he did not have a Hellfire meeting.

It was always funny seeing him like this, enamoured by something you did. One night, after you were walking home together and drunkenly singing Rocky Horror's 'There's A Light', some asshole thought it'd be funny to follow the two of you yelling insults. The alcohol had added to your enraged state, causing you to stalk up to the creep to punch him in the face. Eddie had quickly grabbed your arm and ran into the forests, but the way he had looked at you in the night made you feel warm,

"I uh- gotta go. See you later!" Did he call you babe there? You blinked to yourself, before smirking as you watched his hair bounce as he approached the door,

"Flip the sign!" You yelled quickly, "Thanks Eds!" You grinned to yourself as he left. God, it was good seeing him again- you wanted to tell him how much you missed him but alas, your coworker had to get in the way, along with the timer on the front counter blaring loud, and the bell at the door jingling with his sudden exit. With a small sigh, you glanced at the disappointed woman as she entered, "Good morning!" You said in your best, cheery, customer service voice, "Welcome to Sam's, how may I help you today?" And so your shift began, then seemed to drag on for excruciating hours...

Eddie had remembered to pick you up at one, even arriving a whole twenty minutes early. You could see him leaning against his van outside, nodding along to 'For Whom The Bell Tolls' blaring obnoxiously loud from inside. His head was downcast, but he'd occasionally look around, or glance inside the shop, a cigarette perched between his two fingers that he periodically brought up to his plump lips, smoke tumbling into the air. Someone had come in a little while ago to complain about the loud music and the man outside, but you simply had to smile and say that technically, because it was a public path he was parked on, you couldn't do anything about him. You kept glancing up, and if you made eye contact, he'd smile or stick his tongue out, making faces to try and distract you as you finished up cleaning for the day. You know he'd come in, but he'd 'overstayed' his welcome, according to Sam.

Sam was an old, old-fashioned type of guy. You didn't mind him- part of you looked up to him. He did have his own business that was as successful as anything could be in fucking Hawkins... At least he loved his home- he told you the countless stories of the establishment being an ice cream shop he ran with his wife up until Starcourt opened up. 'Scoops Ahoy' took all his profits so he had to pivot to the next best thing: smoothies. You had no clue why he didn't just make milkshakes, considering they were only a temperature difference from ice cream, but he'd simply smiled and told you 'Sam's Milkshake Bar' didn't have the same ring to it as 'Sam's Smoothie Shack'.

Sam had always been wary of Eddie, not trusting him as he did you. You tried explaining that if he just got to know him, he'd see he was harmless. Though Sam was still cautious, never failing to mutter about 'kids these days' and their 'loud rock music' poisoning their minds. You smiled as you passed by the older man, letting him know you were off for the day and wishing him a good afternoon as you ducked into the back to hang up your apron and grab your jacket and bag,

"Got it stuck in your head, hmm?" You hummed as you exited the store, faintly hearing the jingling of the bell behind you as you left the small shop and approached him. The song had changed to your Kiss song as you approached, almost on queue. You grinned as he glanced up and saw you, appearing to light up instantly. He pushed himself up, the second cigarette he had sparked up falling to the ground and disappeared beneath his shoe,

"Your chariot awaits, my dear!!" He said loudly, moving his arms to gesture to the van you had long missed since you left Hawkins a year ago, "Go on, get in. I've got you for the rest of the day, right?" He said, pushing his hands in his pockets and coming to stand in front of you so you could hear what he was saying over the music. You opened your mouth slightly, glancing from the van back to him and tilting your head,

"For the rest of the day?" You asked amused, and raised your brows as he nodded,

"Come on- didn't you say you missed me?" You knew him. You'd been friends for so long that you could feel the twinge of hurt behind those amused words. Before you could see his face, he moved to the van and opened the passenger side door for you, letting the music grow louder and drown out your worried thoughts, "Get in!!" He yelled over the music, and being left without much choice, you just grinned, walking over to him,

"You give me no choice, Munson," You told him, before clambering inside and throwing your bag at your feet.

He shut the door once you were inside, you let yourself glance around the van you'd spent most of the summer in. It faintly smelled like weed- you hoped he wasn't high at the moment. Eddie was a reckless driver as it was and being high surprisingly didn't make him more careful. It was still messy, but you could tell he made an effort in cleaning it for you. You turned the music down slightly so you could hear yourself think and pulled the overhead mirror down, glancing over your face to make sure your make-up was still intact after the long day. Glancing to the side, you noticed a polaroid of the two of you that was tucked into the side. It was a little older- from the darker background, you could see it was taken in Eddie's room. Both your faces were grinning back at you. You could barely remember taking it because of how greened out you were, but you couldn't deny the picture was a nice one. You could see the date the picture was taken was scrawled on the bottom, along with a small heart drawn in the corner there. You smiled softly, reaching a hand up to skim your finger over the sharpie. You jumped slightly at the sound of the door opening,

"Snooping?" He asked, shutting the door and putting his seatbelt on, gaze flicking to the polaroid,

"Just reacquainting myself," You said, shutting the mirror and leaning back to put your own seatbelt on, "I'm so glad I'm not walking home, my feet are killing me," You sighed, getting comfortable in your seat,

"Mmmh," He hummed, smiling as he started the car, "You should have asked me to take you," He said, glancing over at you,

"And wake you up at four in the morning?" You raised your brows, "I'd just piss off Wayne. We both know you're a heavy sleeper, Eds," You smiled, grabbing the overhead handle as he pulled out of the spot and began driving off. He laughed softly,

"Should have gone and thrown rocks at my window," He said, sparing you a glance. You noticed him eyeing your hand,

"Wouldn't have worked-"

"Then you should have thrown rocks through my window," He said,

"Have you forgotten the possum incident?" You laughed as he shuddered, "Yeah,"

"Those things have to be my least favourite forest creatures," He huffed,

"You have a favourite?" You asked amused,

"I'm not telling you," He huffed, "You can't even trust me to drive you around, "He said, glancing at your arm again,

"I would trust you if you weren't so reckless. You know, I wasn't gonna mention it but how many curbs have we hit already?" You smirked,

"Like... Two?" You gave him a look, "...Four," You laughed softly, at his response, shaking your head and humming softly to the 'Creeping Death' playing through the speakers,

"So is it a wolf?" You asked after a moment, and laughed at the glare he sent you,

"I'm not answering that," He grumbled, but you laughed it off, "Hey, open the glove box for me," He hummed, and you did as he asked. There was a cassette inside which you pulled out and glanced over. In sharpie, he had written-

"'Darkest Nightmare'?" You asked amused, grinning, "You made another mixtape?"

"Uhuh- put it in, I'm kinda sick of Metallica," He sighed, and you did as he asked, grinning as he turned up the radio. As usual, his driving got worse, focusing more on the music you were yelling and screaming along to at the moment, praying the seatbelt would at least protect you from a crash.

Somehow, you'd survived his tour of Hawkins: unsurprisingly, not too much had changed. You drove by the remnants of Starcourt and were saddened to hear of the passing of Cheif Jim Hopper. As much as the old cop loved to give you and Eddie shit for trespassing, he'd only yell at you as you sped off in the van or ran into the forest, laughing together. You were glad, because you really couldn't deal with a criminal record.

The stores along the main street were opening up again, and you eagerly started making plans for which ones you'd want to go to tomorrow. There were a few new ones that had opened up that you were eager to go into. In the meantime, Eddie filled you in on Hellfire and his campaigns, stopping at a diner and eating dinner in the van. It all felt right, and normal again, and you kept smiling fondly as he excited rambled on. Occasionally, you'd remind him of his now cold burger and fries, but he didn't seem to be listening much to you. You didn't mind- you preferred listening anyways.

Once you were done, he drove you back home in comfortable silence, enjoying the mixtape that now played a song by Megadeath you didn't recognise. The sun was setting, causing the sky to bloom in pretty colours that captured your attention. When the trees started getting thicker as you approached Forest Hills, you sighed, grabbing your stuff from the floor. You'd called the trailer park 'home' for the longer part of your life. It hadn't changed either, but you enjoyed his quiet comments on who lived where and what had changed with them. Nothing too interesting but it was nice to be informed,

"...And finally my humble abode," He said, parking the van and undoing his seatbelt,

"Damn... I really did not miss the Hills," You smiled fondly as you looked over his home, before glancing across to your own home. You hadn't realised he had gotten out until your door opened. He smiled at you,

"Gimmie those," He said, and you gently placed the bag in his hand. He quickly extended his other hand to you, and you rolled your eyes as you took it to get out of the van,

"Thank you, oh fair, kind Sir," You said playfully, shutting the door as you got out. He grinned as he slung your bag over his shoulder,

"Anything for you, fair one," He said as he moved behind you to lock the car. You rolled your eyes, folding the jacket over your arm as you glanced around the area, taking it in again. The playground that separated your homes looked the same, nothing having changed in the almost year you were away. Perhaps there were more cigarette butts and trash around the area but that was common here. You felt his presence near you; the familiar and pleasant scent of smoke and a forest earthiness growing stronger, "It uh... Hasn't felt the same without you here," He said surprisingly softly, and you glanced up at him,

"Yeah," You hummed, but realised that didn't make sense, "Uh- I mean it's... Been strange. I've never been away from Hawkins for this long it's... Weird to be back," You said, sighing,

"Yeah, I get it," Eddie said, sighing, "Oh, by the way, someone finally moved into the haunted trailer next to yours," He pointed out, "You've finally got a new neighbour," You looked at the house, smiling fondly as you saw a person hanging up their laundry,

"Huh. I'm surprised Dave finally managed to rent that place out to someone," You said, digging through your pockets to produce your keys, "Oh- right," You mumbled, fiddling with the keychains, "Here!" You smiled at him as you turned to place the charm into his hands, "I had to put it on my keys so I wouldn't forget- you have no idea how stressed I was thinking I lost it back in my dorm," You breathed, smiling,

"Holy shit," He murmured, fingers skimming over the small metal wolf head you'd gotten him, "This is cool," He grinned, "I'll put it with the others," He teased,

"Thought you liked my keyrings," You said, twirling your keys as you began heading home, eyes flicking to your neighbour curiously,

"I do!" He said quickly, "Thanks, a lot. I think it's really cool-"

"Who is that?" You mumbled to him, eyeing the girl hanging up her laundry on your shared line, "Should we go say hi?" You glanced up at him with a small smile,

"Why'd anyone want to say hi to us?" Eddie asked with a chuckle, but you just rolled your eyes and approached her. Her gaze flicked to you both as you approached, and she removed her headphones from her head,

"Hello!" You said as pleasantly as you could. It was the same tone you'd use with customers to appear more friendly. You pleasantly introduced yourself, and stuck your hand out for her to shake, "I live right next door- I haven't uh... Been here though, because I've been in Franklin for college," You said as she placed her hand in yours and shook it, eyes flicking from Eddie to you with an uncertain look, "We share a line," You also added,

"Uhuh. Yeah I know," The red-head said shortly. You grimaced, glancing at Eddie, before looking down at her. She had headphones around her neck, and you could faintly hear a song playing, "Are you guys just gonna stand there now?" She asked, and you blinked for a moment

"Are you a big fan of Kate Bush?" You asked, recognising the song,

"I guess," She said in a dejected way, shrugging as she went back to doing her chore. You glanced at her trailer before looking back at her,

"She's good, right?" You smiled, still trying to make pleasant conversation and not freak her out, "I love 'Running Up That Hill,'" She nodded once, and turned her back on you, and continued working. With a small sigh, you glanced over at Eddie, who shrugged his shoulders, "What's your name?" You asked,

"I'm Max," She said shortly, casting you a glare. With a sigh, you nodded, trying to uphold your cheery disposition,

"Cool- nice to meet you, Max," You smiled, "If you need anything, I'm nex-"

"I heard," She said coldly, casting you another look that was defiantly a glare, "Do you like bothering people when they're doing something?" She asked,

"No, not really," You said quickly, "I'm just trying to be nice and introduce myself to my new neighbour," You frowned, "I just haven't had one in-"

"Great- be nice somewhere else, freak," She muttered, throwing a sheet over the clothing line and grabbing the now empty basket, storming back into her home,

"Damn," You frowned, "It was nice meeting you, Max!" You yelled after her, before turning back to walk to Eddie. He had walked away a little while ago and was waiting for you by your door. You stood by him with a sigh, looking down at your keys, "Wonder what's up with her?" You mumbled, "Think she got grounded or something?" You asked, glancing back at him, "Do people still ground their kids...?" You said playfully with a slight smile, though it fell quickly,

"No, don't think so," He said, walking after you into your home and removing the keys from your door, "More like her uh... Brother? No- her step-brother died in that fire at Starcourt," You nodded solemnly, glancing around your small home with a frown,

"So she's taking it out on everyone else?" You hummed,

"Guess so," He said softly, and you heard the slight thud of your bag as he set it down on your couch,

"Guess she's tired of hearing condolences," You mumbled, eyes flicking to a photograph of your late father on the wall with a small frown. You heard the door close and the clicking of the locks as Eddie closed it for you. You muttered a small 'thank you' as you stretched your arms above your head tiredly, "Did you know him?" You asked, "This step-brother?"

"Did I know Billy Hargreeves?" He said, turning to look at you. You winced at the mention of the name, "Yeah. We did," He said solemnly. Hargreeves was new but quickly established himself as one of the worst assholes you'd ever met. You did what you could to stay out of his way because of how... Violent he usually got...

"God..." You sighed, "Well..." You mumbled, throwing your jacket over the couch and falling back on it. You still hadn't unpacked since you came back- your suitcase stood where you'd left it by the door, along with a duffle bag that was flung to the ground. You just didn't have the motivation to wash all your clothes or get unpacked... And besides, the clothing line was full, thanks to Max. You could hear Eddie moving around behind you, rummaging through your kitchen to find something to eat, "You know I haven't been called a freak since I left Hawkins?" You said, moving a hand up to your forehead to rub at it, trying to soothe the tension and pain growing there,

"Seriously?" He asked, amusement clear in his tone, "Thought... You know, college? People there would be more..." He trailed off,

"Surprisingly, there are a lot more 'freaks' and 'goths' in the big city," You smiled, leaning your head back all the way to watch him. Eddie had shed himself of his usual jackets, hanging them up on the back of one of the two chairs so he was left in just his Hellfire shirt. He'd rolled his sleeves up so you could see the peaks of the bat swarm frozen in ink on his arm. You watched as he rummaged in your drawer, pulling out a bottle opener and hearing the clicks of two bottles opening. You sighed softly, smiling as he walked over to you, "Have I mentioned you're the best?" You grinned as you sat back up, shifting to give him some space so he could sit with you,

"Mh- you deserve something after a hard day's work," He winked playfully, clinking the bottle with you as you eagerly took a swig of the beer, humming happily as you drank the cold liquid,

"Yeah, uhuh," You hummed between sips,

"I'd also make you something to eat but-"

"But you're banned from my kitchen," You grinned, "After you set fucking popcorn on fire-"

"It's not my fault your microwave is stupid!!" He grinned,

"It's a normal microwave Eds! You set it to thirty minutes and not three," You both laughed, "How the fuck do you burn popcorn?" You ask between giggles,

"I guess it's a special talent of mine," He hummed, taking a sip as you continued laughing, "Anyways, you really should eat something. Knowing you and how long you take getting ready, then with the walk... I doubt you've eaten much today," He said softly,

"When'd you become the food police, Eds?" You smiled,

"Considering you're drinking and only ate dinner today, I don't want you to get too drunk too fast," You almost spit out your beer,

"Eds- I'm not gonna get drunk off one beer," You smiled at him,

"Still. Better to eat and drink," He winked at you, clicking his fingers. You sighed, drinking more of your beer, "You've got nothing but drinks, babe," He added, and you glanced over at him as he took a sip, "And when did you get back?"

"Yesterday? I haven't had the time to go shopping-"

"Nope- you got here two days ago," He said, and you turned your head from where you'd been staring at the decorations you had put up to stare at him,

"How did you...?" You asked softly, and watched as he frowned softly, taking a swig before setting the bottle on the ground near your feet, "How did you know?" You asked with a frown,

"I saw you uh... Coming home," He admitted, "Two days ago..." He said, not looking at you and instead focusing on how much beer was left in his bottle,

"I got here at, like, 3 am Eddie?" You said, blinking,

"Yeah. You did," He nodded, watching you. You were silent for a moment,

"Why were you awake at 3 am?" You asked. He briefly met your eyes, before looking away and taking a nervous, shaky breath,

"I..." His eyes darted around,

"Why didn't you-"

"Dude, who goes to someone's house at 3 am?" He said, quickly standing and walking away from you. You jumped slightly at how fast he moved, before turning your whole body so you could watch him, confused at his sudden mood change, "I didn't want to bother you since you clearly didn't..." He trailed off, back turned to you. Your eyes widened slightly,

"Eddie, what?" You stood, careful of the beer you'd nudged with your foot and following after him, "I didn't do what?" You asked, standing near the couch to give him space. He moved into your kitchen and stood by your table, leaning against it at first,

"You just-" He sighed, sitting on top of the table, eyes focusing on the floor and watching his shoes shuffling around on the floor for a moment, before speaking "You were gone for- what? Almost a year," He said your name quietly, and you frowned from where you watched him on the couch, "I mean, what was I supposed to think?"

"I wrote letters to you," You said, "I sent you packages and letters as much as I could- we never stopped talking," You said,

"But you didn't visit," He said with a frown, glancing up at you. He couldn't hold the eye contact, and found himself looking away quickly, again. He folded his arms across his chest, "What was I supposed to think? My best friend just... Didn't want to hang out with me anymore?" He shrugged. From the dim, setting sunlight shining inside, you could see his eyes twinkling with tears, and you could feel your heart constrict for him in your chest,

"I wrote to you explaining why I couldn't go," You said defensively, walking closer to him, "Fuck, Eds, I don't have the damn money to be driving back and forth between Franklin and Hawkins!" You said louder than intended, "It wasn't about not wanting to hang out with you, it was about saving money-"

"Okay- I get that," He said sharply, "But my point is... What else do you have here?" He glanced at you, "You and I both hate this place, we made plans all the time to get out of Hawkins- you got out and I stayed behind, I-"

"Eddie, I couldn't stay here another fucking year waiting for you to graduate," You tried, coming to stand in front of him, "You... We both know how awful living here is. This small town will only see us as... Freaks and... Damned devil worshipers when we're not-"

"Right- of course!" He said sarcastically, throwing his hands up and laughing coldly, "I'm sorry, I just thought that if you got the privilege to leave Hawkins, it'd at least... Be with me," He said, looking into your eyes. His wide, brown eyes bore into yours and were tinted slightly pink. A few tears slipped down his reddened cheeks and you could faintly see the tremble in his lips. He'd folded his arms again and was digging his fingernails into his forearms, knuckles going white and small crescents appearing in his skin. You blinked, opening your mouth to say something, but closed it,

"Eddie..." You said softly, watching him move his head to look away from you. Seeing another tear rolling down his cheek, you reached a hand up to try and wipe it off of his face without thinking. He quickly flinched, slapping your hand away with his and shaking his head, leaving you shocked,

"Fuck," He hissed, and stood abruptly, making you back away. He reached to the side, grabbing his jean jacket from the chair, "Forget about it," You heard him mutter his name,

"Eddie!" You yelled after him as he moved quickly to your door, fumbling with your keys to unlock it, "Eddie what is going on- talk to me please," You begged,

"I said forget about it, okay?" He turned sharply. You stared at him, never seeing him so hurt with you before. You really didn't know what to do, and instead stared at him as you both stared at one another,

"But- Eddie!" You yelled out of your door as he quickly turned away and began walking away, "Stop running from me- Eddie!" You called again, wincing at how your voice echoed through the park. But he didn't turn. He just walked home faster.

You felt frozen in place, staring after him as his hair fluttered behind him dramatically. You opened your mouth to call after him again, but quickly closed it, feeling tears brimming in your eyes as you disappeared inside. You could hear the door slamming behind him, and you quickly shut your own door, falling back against it as you let your tears fall,

"What the fuck?" You breathed, blinking rapidly. In all the years you knew Eddie, you never... Fought like this: where you were both too distraught to even want to look at one another, or solve the problem. He had never run from you. You had never... Been the problem.

Hours passed but your mind was still occupied with Eddie and the fight. Your mind was always occupied with Eddie, but you were never worried for him like this... You tried distracting yourself by going grocery shopping before the sun would completely set. The burn in your legs as you walked into town helped- at least that was a physical pain and not... Ugh.

The pain in your arms accompanied you on your way home, and you found yourself regretting your decision to walk. Maybe you should have waited until things cooled off with Eddie so you could at least catch a ride here and there. The ice cream you had bought would surely be melted by now- what made you want ice cream anyways? You also couldn't buy any beer or vodka to take the pain away, so unless you wanted to see the one person you really didn't want to right now, you'd have to... Reconcile your emotions...

Okay.

Eddie was obviously upset you had left, but why on Earth was he pissed off at you? It wasn't your choice to leave- you'd sent your applications together... Though you never saw his, he had drunkenly admitted to you that he'd failed his final year days later and would have to stay in Hawkins to repeat it. He'd said it casually and whenever you mentioned it, he'd just wave it off like it wasn't a big deal to him. It had made you sad to know he wouldn't be leaving with you, but he never... Saw it as a big deal. Or made it look like that.

Did he think you left because of him? Eddie always ran from his problems- that's just what he did. If he knew he wasn't able to pass a quiz, he wouldn't show up for it; if he knew he couldn't finish a project in time, he wouldn't submit anything. You were there for all his failures, and tried supporting him through them, but he'd always make the same comment about 'education not defining him' or the 'project being stupid' and 'pointless'. You never realised how... Bad it was for him...

And perhaps it didn't help that you came home and didn't speak a word to him for the two days. It was purely overwhelming being back in a town where every person you passed cast you disgusted looks simply for how you'd dress or do your make-up. What was strange to them was scary, but it made you feel unwelcome and unwanted in a place that was supposed to be home. It's why you hated it in Hawkins. All you had here was Eddie. You sought comfort in your shared strangeness and unwillingness to conform to society- their 'shunning' hurt less when you were together. You had his comfort.

But you should be angry at him too- he was mad at you for something out of your control, and that hurt. If you could have left with him, you would. Why did he not realise that? You spoke about leaving Hawkins all the time... With a sigh, you flexed your fingers, looking over the empty grocery bags now on the floor of your kitchen. You were done unpacking those, and now had nothing to do. You glanced over at the waiting suitcase and duffle. If you were unpacking groceries you might as well make yourself at... home. Briefly, you glanced up at the window, and froze, noticing the very man your brain was occupied by.

A long plume of smoke left his lips, swirling into the dark sky. The end of the blunt he had rolled faintly glowed orange as he took a drag. He was faintly illuminated by the lights around the area, and you could see his shoulders sag as he looked down. You could faintly hear the sound of his shoes kicking against the metal dome structure of the park you both frequently found yourselves in on your peaks or come downs. You'd lay back on the grass together, staring at the multitude of stars, or giggling and shushing one another as you tried to fit into the tiny seats of the swingset...

He was sitting in just his vest, the pins glittering in the night- you could see from where you were that he'd pulled the sleeves of the Hellfire shirt down over his arms to fight the chill of the night. You glanced over your shoulder to your kitchen table and sighed- he forgot to take his jacket with him...

You grabbed it, pulling it over your shoulders and allowing yourself to breathe in his scent. You weren't sure of calling Hawkins your physical home, but you were sure that Eddie's smell was the closest you'd ever feel to describing home... At least now you had an incentive to go make up with him again. Ha... Ha...

Silently, you shuffled to your door, picking the keys up you had dropped. You allowed yourself a moment to gather your thoughts, before stuffing the keys into the pocket of the leather, enjoying the feeling of it brushing against your skin again. As you opened the door, you found Eddie right outside, muttering to himself and seemingly doing the same thing you were a moment ago. You both jumped back slightly in surprise at finding the other person in the same place, and for a moment, you both stared, unmoving and unspeaking. Until finally, you opened your mouth,

"Uh," You tried, clearing your throat and looking down for a moment, "You uh... Got any more blunts we could... Share?" You asked him uncertainly, glancing back up at him. You could still see his face was red in the faint light from inside your home. He had been crying too. He only gave you a small nod, still silent as you turned the lights inside your home off and locked the door behind you.

Together, you walked to the park again, still lost in your own heads and silent. Your eyes flicked to him and you watched him as he sat beside you in your usual spot on top of the dome. His movements were slow and careful as he handed over a roughly rolled blunt and lighter,

"Thanks," You said, picking the blunt up in your fingers and reaching for the lighter, only to have him pull it into his grasp and lighting it. Carefully, you lit the blunt and took a drag, "Thanks," You breathed again as you handed it over for him to take a hit of,

"No problem-" His voice was shaky, "Shit," He whispered. You glanced over at him, noticing one of his hands still shaking. He had this far-away look in his eye that made you fill with a deep sadness for him,

"I'll uhm... Start," You said softly, glancing behind you and carefully setting your hands on the poles of the dome and grabbing on to them to steady yourself. With a sigh, you began, "Okay," You closed your eyes, nodding your head to collect your thoughts, before speaking, "I'm sorry. For not seeing you as soon as I got back, Eddie. It's just... It's been a lot being back here in Hawkins. You know how bad being here makes me feel, and finding out I might be getting evicted and getting back into a job, I just..." You sighed deeply, "I know you're mad at me for leaving and not talking to you and stuff but... I have responsibilities now," You explained, looking up at him. He was listening but not looking at you, focused on rolling the blunt between his fingers as it smouldered idly, "I'm an adult. I have to... Live. Pay bills, make money... That shit," You said, reaching forwards and taking the blunt from him, taking a drag, "It's just been a lot. I did want to spend time with you just... I wanted to wait until I got everything figured out," You concluded, nodding solemnly, "I didn't mean to make you feel like I... Didn't want to see you or anything," You frowned.

From beside you, Eddie sighed, and you could see his hair shaking as he nodded to your final statement. It took a moment for him to say anything- he shifted first, moving so he could rest his hands on his knees and clasp his hands together, pressing them to his mouth,

"Shit," He sighed, pressing his hands to his forehead, "That's... Yeah," He nodded. You stared at him, waiting for him to speak, but frowning as he didn't,

"What's up?" You asked,

"Well, whatever I'm gonna say is gonna sound fucking pointless compared to you," He sighed, sparing you a glance. You frowned at him, shifting so you could look at him better, only for Eddie to turn his head away from you again. You delicately placed a hand on his shoulder,

"Eds, no I'm not gonna..." You sighed, "If you don't run away from me again, I'm not... Gonna find it pointless," You said, patting him gently. You tilted your head to try and appear in his field of vision and gave him an encouraging smile. He grimaced at you, fully turning his head to look back to his trailer, before sighing. You felt him relax under your touch slightly, and turn his head slightly to look at you,

"We just..." He sighed, "I missed you so much," He breathed, and you saw the tears quickly rolling down his face, "And after we'd talked so much about... Leaving Hawkins behind- together," He looked at you, eyes finding yours quickly, "It was always together. Leaving, and living together somewhere. Working... Together," He rambled, "And then... Watching you leave without me... It made me realise that... Fuck," He sighed,

"You can say it, Eds," You said softly. He shook his head slightly, and as you opened your mouth to encourage him again, you felt his shoulder move. He took your hand in his, bringing it down to rest on the cool metal below you. You watched, curiously, as he moved his hand so he was holding yours,

"It made me realise that we've... Spent the better parts of our lives together. It made me realise how much losing you hurt me- and that terrified me," He spoke your name worriedly, and lifted an arm to wipe his wet face, "And made me realise that I never wanted to lose you again," He rambled suddenly, his words making your heart thunder in your chest, "And when you wrote saying that you weren't gonna be back for the summer, the winter, and the spring..." He breathed shakily, "I knew it was because you had nothing left here and I guess a part of me thought you meant me too..." He sniffled, "It made me realise I uhm... Actually want to finish school now-" He laughed to himself, "-So I can finally leave and... Find you again- be with you again, like we always were... I mean, sure I can pretend to be confident, and fine without you- God knows I've had practice with that with Hellfire, but-" He took a deep breath to steady himself, "Pretending to be fine without you just made me miss you way more," He said, breathing shakily, "It... Made me realise I..." The words died on his tongue momentarily, and he just sighed, "I think I'm in love with you," He confessed.

For a moment it felt like time stood still, your eyes captured by his, your breath stuck in your throat as those words left his mouth. You blinked a few times and let the blunt fall from your hand, tumbling to the ground. Your now empty hand balled, your nails dug into your palm to wake you up from this most pleasant of dreams. Your own eyes rapidly filled with tears: here was your best friend, who you have loved and pined over for so long, admitting he finally felt the same for you as you felt for him the moment you first met him,

"And I know you might not feel the same for me, and that's fine," He rambled on, seemingly not realising you were completely dumbfounded by his words, "But I just need you to know that I love you and-"

You quickly pressed your lips to his to silence him, and it took him a moment to register what was happening, causing him to let out a startled 'mmph!' as your lips touched. It was a moment before you felt Eddie's lips moving against yours. Your hands moved up to touch his cheeks, skin gentle yet wet with tears against your hands you pulled him closer. His own hands soon moved to your arms, holding you in place so gently, that when you parted, tears spilled down your face too. You let out a gentle laugh,

"Eddie, you big stupid idiot," You smiled at him, moving a thumb over his cheek to swipe a tear rolling down his face, "I think I love you too," You said, "Don't you think if I could, I wouldn't spend all my time with you?" You said softly,

"Yeah," He breathed, appearing starstruck, round eyes darting over your face for any sign of a lie,

"Yeah," You grinned back, gripping his hand and shaking it a little, "Dumbass," You said affectionately,

"But I thought-"

"Thought what?" You quickly said, "I didn't feel the same?" He nodded slowly, "Eddie..."

"I didn't think you wanted to be around me anymore," He admitted softly, "I thought... You know. You'd find new people out in Franklin and you wouldn't need me anymore," He said softly, looking at you now,

"Oh, Eddie," You said softly, squeezing his hand gently, "I guarantee no one could ever replace you," You assured him, "Besides? It's what? Only a matter of time before you find out if you passed your exams and then you'll move up to Franklin with me," You said softly,

"You want me up there with you?" He asked uncertainly,

"Of course, Eddie," You said, "Those dorms suck. If we got a place together and split the rent somewhere close, I think it'd work out," You said softly, squeezing his hand again. He stared at you for a moment, before smiling slightly and leaning forward to kiss you again. You smiled against his lips, tilting your head to kiss him better and moving your hand back to touch his face gently,

"I've uh..." He said softly as he pulled away just enough to speak, his forehead touching yours, "I've wanted to do that for a long time," He said, breathily. He then whispered your name, and you smiled,

"Well, I'm glad you finally did... Babe," You said with a smile, happy to hear him laugh. He glanced down at your joint hands, and brought them up to his face to kiss your knuckles. The act made your eyes widen and you quickly moved your hand from his to put both hands on his face and pull him close, kissing him again. It was almost like now you'd started, you never wanted to stop...

"Ew," You heard from the blue. You jumped, turning to stare at Max, who was leaning against the flimsy metal of the fence surrounding the park and frowning at you two, "Do you always cry when you kiss?" She asked as you whipped away the tears on your face,

"No," You quickly said, "We're just... Having an emotional moment, okay?" You said with a small laugh,

"Yeah, you spying on us, kid?" You heard Eddie say from beside you, and when you removed your hands from your eyes, you could see he had slid off the structure and was waiting for you with a hand outstretched. Ever the gentleman... Gently, you slid your hand into his, moving off the structure and glancing down at the grass, making sure the blunt had been put out, before tightening your hold on Eddie's hand,

"What're you doing out here anyway?" You asked, turning to look at her. She shrugged, putting her headphones back on and turning on her heel,

"I'm going on a walk," She mumbled, taking a few steps away from you,

"But it's dark?" You said, moving forward with Eddie still holding you close,

"Yeah, kid, it's not safe," He chimed in, and you glanced up at him with a slight smile,

"Why do you two care? Don't you have more crying and kissing to do?" She said coldly, and involuntarily, you let out a snort. You covered your mouth quickly, but Eddie had heard, and began to laugh,

"Shut up, Eds," You grinned, before glancing back at Max, "You're funny, kid-"

"I don't need babysitters," She said, "I'm not a kid, either," She huffed, but you were already hopping over the fence and following after her,

"Sure you do!" You grinned, stuffing your hands into the pockets of Eddie's leather jacket and glancing over as you felt him looping arms with you,

"Yeah, we'll chase the monsters away k- Max," He said, and though she sent you two a glare, it made you feel better knowing you were going after her and ensuring she was safe. Besides- she had her headphones on and walkman playing a tape. She couldn't hear you and Eddie talking and laughing as you caught up on all you had missed when you were apart. Finally, you were together again, and now that you'd confessed you loved him and begun eagerly planning your future together, you hoped he wouldn't feel as alone as he did without you.

#eddie munson stranger things #eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #stranger things season four #stranger things season 4 #stranger things #stranger things 4 spoilers #stranger things spoilers #st4 #stranger things 4 #joesph quinn #joe quinn

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blackbat05 · 3 years ago

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I need a break

Shangqi x Reader (Platonic)

A/N: I feel like I’m loosing steam towards the end of my placement and wow I have never needed a break this badly before. Perhaps a short Shangqi x Reader imagine where they are both University students. Seriously at this rate I’ll just be solely a Shangqi writer HAHAHA. Doing this on my phone because I don’t want to open my work computer. Let’s see where this impromptu idea takes me to. Hope you enjoy it and as always like and comment if you wish!

Genre: PG-13

Warnings: None really, just friends supporting each other! I guess there’s an inaccurate timeline if you look at the MCU but hey this is an imagine plus if you look at some of the wiki pages, Shangqi is actually born in 1998/1999. So appreciate if you’re kind enough to go with the flow to read this comfort fic!

‘Y/N!’ Shangqi rushes to catch up with you after class. You made an effort to conceal your tiredness but he saw it right through. ‘Gosh…you alright?’

You think to yourself. Were you really alright? The answer was pretty obvious. You were ten weeks into your placement and your emotions were a jumbled up mess. Having to deal with work responsibilities was one problem, school assignments were another issue all together. At this point, you felt like you were just getting through each week for the sake of it.

At first, you believed that what you were going through was simply a transition to becoming an adult. You thought that naturally, you would be able to persevere through the stressful periods by yourself. But of course, it has been hard.

You were a social work intern at a neighborhood youth centre, thirty minutes away if you took the train and bus. The work was fulfilling in it’s own ways, but recently there were self-doubts filling your brain, if you were really cut out for the job in the future. If you weren’t, what else could you do?

As you sat with Shangqi in the school’s student-ran cafe, you found yourself pouring out the exact same concerns to him. Credit to him, Shangqi never interrupted your monologue, he just simply listened. That’s what best friends were for. That’s what you did for him to when he ran into issues with his family.

Even then, he couldn’t deny that hearing you doubt yourself broke his heart. He had known you since high school. You mostly kept to yourself and one or two close friends. Despite joining the school’s athletic team where you were one of the main athletes, you preferred to stay in the shadows unlike some of your teammates. That didn’t stop you from going out of your way to help other students in need; like helping the girl who was in an arm cast to copy the social studies notes, even if it meant you had to do it twice. Or maybe just talking to a friend who was stressed out about their results.

Basically, you had studied your ass off to get a secured spot at this university who were only one of the few that offered the degree. He remembers you telling him the moment you got your offer, ‘I’m finally good at something. I don’t have to worry anymore!’

Shangqi wasn’t stupid. The pandemic had done some crazy things. And by crazy, it affected the self-esteem that you had been working so hard on by participating in various projects and events, with you being in charge of a drama production that was promoting on mental health. That was a big deal considering that you were a major introvert.

Online engagement was never easy. In fact he has heard some of your struggles that you’ve shared with him regarding this and it only makes him admire you even more. For someone who preferred to keep to themselves, stepping out of one’s comfort zone, to take on a role that wasn’t just simply about helping people - that took guts.

‘I’m sorry I’m just loading you with all this. I just feel…’ You trailed off, suddenly becoming emotional again. Again, Shangqi does not pry. ‘That I can’t do anything right.’ You emphasize that you had ended the statement for you were unsure that you could keep your cool if you had tried to continue on.

‘If I hear you saying sorry another time,’ he chides, ‘you’re paying for our meal later.’ Your lips curved upwards slightly before returning to its somber position. Shangqi decides that a meal won’t cut it. He needs to deploy ‘Operation Y/N’. Standing up with your buzzer to collect the food, Shangqi whips out his phone. There will be a few changes for today.

Food was definitely a cure in this situation, but it was only a part of the solution. After inhaling your ramen at light speed, Shangqi tells you that today will be a different Friday. ‘And you can’t complain! It’ll be a weekend tmr,’ he tells you. So why not? You figured that even if you went back home early, your head wouldn’t be in the right place to complete the essay for your English module.

‘Hold up! The VR studio that Katy was talking about?’ You look at the tickets inside the taxi that was taking you and Shangqi to the location. ‘How did you even, it was so hard to get these tickets!’ From the time Shangqi met you outside the classroom, he had yet to see you so ecstatic. Until now.

‘Well,’ Shangqi gives his best shrug. ‘I called in a favor from a friend. Said that it was for emergency purposes.’ He raised his fingers to make connotations in the air much to your amusement.

‘Wow… just how much do I not know about you Mr Popular?’ You teased. Shangqi decides to leave the fact on him having to persuade the Wakandan Princess in giving him free tickets.

‘Please! I swear whatever you want me to do, I’ll do it! It’s for Y/N!’

‘Ey well why didn’t you say so? If it’s for that nice friend, of course!’ Shuri leaves the entrance of the compound, an exasperated Shangqi trailing behind.

Yeah, the VR studio that Katy told them about was also funded by King T’Challa himself. With stunning life like visuals thanks to Wakandan technology, the VR studio was located in a middle class neighborhood. T’Challa believed that no matter where kids came from, they should have the right to enjoy and to explore the world. For now, he wasn’t ready to share that he was on the way on becoming a full-fledged Avenger yet - you just had too much on your plate. He’ll just have to settle with this white lie.

‘Is Katy coming?’ You were on the verge of vibrating off your seat. ‘She would love this place!’ Even when you were struggling, Y/N still manages to think about other people. Today, Y/N will put her needs first.

As if to answer your previous question, you can see an equally excited Katy waiting for the two of you at the roundabout. ‘HEL-LO EVERYONE! LET’S GET OUR FRIDAY STARTED IN PROPER SHALL WE?’ Her loud voice had attracted stares, some very displeased looks too but at this point in time, you didn’t give a damn. Katy was right, it was time to enjoy!

You wished that you could slow down time, or even replay it continuously when you needed cheering up because the only thing you felt was pure happiness - euphoria even. Your stomach was in knots for laughing hysterically together with Katy when Shangqi jumped in shock from a surprise scare from a zombie. ‘I’m keeping that for leverage,’ she tells you, quietly slipping her phone into her fanny pack.

The Wakandans had really outdone themselves this time. Your favorite VR was the paradise VR. Slipping the headgear, you say goodbye to the smiles of Katy and Shangqi, whisking away to a beach that oddly reminded you of your dream destination - Hawaii. From where you were standing, you were surrounded by green and majestic islands. Despite their sheer size, you weren’t intimidated. In fact, you were healing.

Your mind was no longer in the room of the VR studio. How could it when the sun kissed your skin, giving you the much needed energy that you were lacking for so long? In the room, the two sees you kick your shoes to the side, going barefoot. It may have seem strange, but with the monitor beside you, your actions were perfectly logical.

As a kid, you used to despise the prickly feeling of sand in between your toes. But now, you grew to love the sensation that each grain of sand had on your skin. It made you feel grounded, that everything was going to be ok. You raise your virtual hand to touch your face - were you crying?

‘She must have been really stressed huh?’ Katy whispers to Shangqi who nods in return. How he hated the fact that you were giving so much to your work but still felt underappreciated. Forget the Avengers with superhuman abilities, you were the true MVP. The VR ends and you remove your headgear. ‘I’m ok,’ you automatically reassure them despite the dry tears left on both cheeks. You step down the platform slowly, trying to regain sense of the real world.

What you didn’t expect was the two embracing you in a hug, squishing you in between them. Maybe that had set off the waterworks. For someone like Katy, she had sage advice.

‘Life can be pretty shitty right? But I’m so proud of you fighting it Y/N. Just remember that it’s ok to be weak. I mean, I’ve seen worse from Shangqi,’ she jabs her finger towards his direction, earning a glare from him. That’s Katy, always trying to add a bit of humor to this grey world. Calming down, you let go of the both of them. ‘Thanks guys, for everything.’

‘Hey,’ Shangqi responds, slinging his arm over your shoulder. ‘We’re friends, so we don’t leave each other behind.’ Phone beeping, he retrieves it to check the message. ‘And look at that, nice timing. Who wants Korean BBQ?’

Trailing behind them, you get an amusing view of Shangqi bickering with Katy on how many Soju bottles she’s allowed to order later. As San Francisco welcomed the night, you were just thankful that you had the two of them to walk through this crazy maze called life.

‘Last one to the shop is paying!’

‘Oh you’re on Mister!’

A/N: I really just think that this was also an imagine for me to cope too. So I can only hope to finish my placement/assignments/exams well! To anyone who does studies and work simultaneously, I fucking respect you (allow me to use expletives for now, these people deserve the respect). If you’re going through a stressful time, I hope this brings the slightest comfort for you and remember… YOU ARE NOT ALONE! Again, thank you for reading!

#shang chi #xu shangqi #shangqi x reader #shangqi imagine #katy shang chi #shang chi x reader #shangqi #simu liu

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secretbangtnn · 4 years ago

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summary : Getting a letter from a very prestigious school was something that you could have never expect, and even more unexpected was that you didn’t need to pay a penny for it. Beautiful news that were too good to be true, but oh how stupid you were to not question such a perfect chance to get away from your shitty life.

notes:

Guys i would be more than happy for some feedback, its my first time writing in english and im more than nervous. Im not sure if what i wrote is good or even understandable. + i would be more than happy to start an ask game with this book

Chapter one

Living or in your case existing was always somehow calm. Everything you do had a plan and everyday had the same pattern, like a boring vase that stood in the same kitchen you actually were. Blue marble tiles awfully similar to tears that run down the woman's cheeks, making them a little bit more redder than before.

Not that they weren't that color before, always blushy and ready to be seen. And maybe that's why you had that sour taste in your mouth while watching them, knowing that your own were as beautifully red as hers.

"why?" a simple question sounding now like the last call for help. Voice groggy and nose runny making the sight before even more unbearable to look at. But why weren't you moved, why the tears didn't make you guality like they should. "you planned this?! You planned to leave me alone like a selfish bastard!"

Looking down didn't seem like the best option, knowing that it could just take the nerves in the room to a whole new level but you could not stop yourself. She was always one to guilt trip you into everything.

A little shout left the chapped mouth making you jump a little while lifting your head simultaneously. Sight before you seems to worsen and as you took a step back the woman took another two in the end catching your small wrist in her clawed hand.

Hissing and looking dead in her eyes made you somehow more conscious of the whole situation.

“I didn’t know.” and you really did not. Gritting your teeth so hard that it felt like some of them could fall out at any moment seems to stop you from doing sudden movements.

Breathe in and breathe out.

“Of course you think I am stupid! Just like your father, bringing me to insanity step by step. But that’s what you wanted from the beginning, am I right?”

“Stop being delusional mom” Oh how hard it was to say the name of that woman. Mother of child that she forgets most of the time, only to remember at the most shitty time. Today was exactly one of the examples of why your dream was just to wake up not seeing or better not having to think of that woman.

“Am i now? It’s you who wants me like this.” She laughed, throwing her head back in the motion. Elegant column of her neck now easy to see, showing purple and red marks similar to those from claws. “You thought I would not know, you thought you could just run away like a scared little child. Now tell me, how long were you planning this o-or maybe it was your father’s plan from the beginning.”

“I didn’t know about it, I didn’t even apply to any of the schools and you are the one that should know that.” toxicity leaked from your voice in big streams, but it was something that u could not stop at that moment. She was doing it again, acting crazy and psycho making everyone question why she wasnt getting hospital help yet.

“So you are saying that it’s my fault? You were supposed to care for me, for your ill mother, not that you are useful for anything else. How could you even think of disappearing, going to school so far away and leaving me to rot here myself like you were not meant to end like this too!”

Snatching your hand you looked at the woman once again, tears in eyes making you look fragile. Her own body looking weak, nearly dead limbs hanging from a malnourished body, showing the world wrack of a woman she was. Complexion ill looking, but what was not in her case, pale looking with green, purple and blue spots everywhere the skin was shown.

“Why are you being so shocked? Don’t tell me you thought you were going to leave someday.” Her laugh made you grit your teeth, jaw starting to hurt from the tension you were keeping. “Once again you showed how foolish you are, just like your father, just like that scumbag.”

“You are insane.”

“That we already know, so why don’t you come back to your room and start preparing for tomorrow. I want to eat a really nice breakfast next morning and maybe then after we can talk about what job you are going to have to make a living for us.”

And that was your sign to go, not looking back at the sick smirk on your mother mouth momocking your whole being. Step by step you saw the old stairs, in some place missing the color. Your room was nothing special, at least that what people said, for you it was some type of heaven. Peace that you could only catch while being there, laying on your old bed while looking at the dull ceiling.

Closing the door, you exchaled a heavy breath, sliding down on the flat surface of the door. Eyes closed like you have always done after an intense situation, today was not an exception to that.

Asking yourself what just happened, how and why. Unconsciously you looked at the letter beside you, laying so weirdly on the piece of not carpeted floor. The big fault in a little piece of paper. It was funny how this thing made such a bad influence on your life just by arriving on your doorstep.

The fact that the only person you could compare yourself to now is a story character of the name Harry was nearly not as funny as it sounded. However how u can explain getting a letter from a prestigious school you for sure did not apply or even looked up not even thinking about getting a scholarship to having a chance to think about it.

By any chance you were not stupid, but your ambitions flew away with another day in this shit hole you called home. Main reason being your own mother, which not only made it clear but for sure would kill you faster than let you leave.

You took the letter, keeping it in your hand like some unknown object you have never seen before. The texture itself is weird, making you shiver in some way. Big letter stood on the black piece of paper meaning only one thing.

Oh yes, that definitely was unsetting.

You remember clearly the first time you read the words that were put in this blank envelope. Big chance waiting for you, welcoming you with big arms and assuring you that you have nothing to be scared of.

And maybe those words were the one that brought you to that situation. It was not even three hours after the fight with your mother. Sun long down now moon shining on your pale face. Packing everything you tried to be quiet and quick hoping that your mother again ate too much of those big pills.

Big bag now laying down on your bed with a small letter beside it looking as innocent as before. You were not even seventeen making decisions that would cost you more then you can imagine. Living hell with possibility of going to another but in that moment nothing mattered like running away from old monsters.

Floor cracked under your feet even thought you were considered as a lightweight. How could you not be so malnourished when your mother forced you to teach yourself how to cook, never letting you eat before her. You tried to reason her moods or harsh behaviour to you but no matter how many times you tried it always ended in another reason why your life was just simply sad.

Running away was a good decision. You tried to say it so many times to actually believe in those empty words. The truth was that you were an innocent little child, not even a full adult that has never tasted a social life or had a friend.

“It will be alright.” Taste on your tongue after saying this a little sour with a heavy backpack danglin on your right arm. One step and then another, you touched the cold handle of your white doors. It was the first move to make and probably one of the hardest.

Bag on your arm is even more heavy making you realise what is happening. Silent breath flowed past your lips preparing you for your next step.

You pushed it closing it carefully while hoping that the oldish touch to the wood wont make an appearance in a loud noise. Silly smile now seen on your face with big relief in the back of your mind. The hardest part was just before you.

Your mothers room, not fully closed - like always, she needed to make sure nobody would come uninvited. It was just one of her weird characteristics that came with such a messed up mental health.

Small noise came out under your feet, not loud enough to wake up the woman next door but audible enough to be heard from closer.

Photos all around you telling you that you were getting near the main door. Little pictures with you inside faded from ears of hanging, making you stop for a while.

Smooth glass now under your fingers as you touch a specific photo. You and your mother being in the green garden of your grandmas. Happy vibe and pretty smiles now nearly unbelievable to witness on either of faces. It hurted or maybe it was just the adrenaline escaping from a sudden stop.

Oh how the sweet monet was quickly destroyed by the harsh noise from one of the rooms, and you exactly know which one. Loud thud rang out in the quietness of the house, making the silence even more noticable. Your breath escaped leaving you in a big ball of nerves and anxiety.

One...two...three

Silence like the one before big storms but maybe just this time it was not that. You couldn't withdraw now, you were too far and too close to the feeling of freeness. So you did the only thing that came to your mind.

Catching a sliding backpack, you turned to the door in front of you, knowing that just behind them is waiting something so much bigger than your old mother. How stupid for you to not rethink your decision, and believing your innocent mind that its just a good thing, better life that could only make you happier.

So you did it, you took the heavy steps that echoed in the narrow corridor. Light breeze touched your face, and just like the first time you gasped at the feeling. Door closing not that gently as you started running as fast as you could.

Silly smile now on your face with a bouncing bag on your shoulders keeping you on the hard ground. It was feeling similar to the first sight of the ocean or the first taste of sweet ice cream on a hot summery morning. You were in ecstasy choked by the overwhelming emotions.

And maybe because of that you were completely unaware of the danger that waited for you on that chilly night. How could you think about it when everything seemed so distracting almost as you were dreaming and in that moment you probably were closer to believing in this being a slumber.

So as you sat on the cold bench of one of the parks near your home, realization finally came silencing your beating heart. Colder weather now felt more real, as it bit your rosy cheeks. You shivered, keeping your backpack on your lap, trying to hide behind it from a chilly wind that seemed like it came from every side.

Being alone hit you like a truck and the little noises of the night didn't help your rising nerver. You started to lose your breath, feeling your tears sliding down your numb cheeks. It was terrifying now with the knowledge of your wellbeing and adrenaline wearing off with every second.

“Mom?” A silent plea that came out of your lips with shakiness that was more than noticeable. You didn't know why you said that, but the woman was probably the only person you knew. Such a sad truth that you needed to understand. You were alone now, and with that thought a more shameless sobs left your mouth with an occasional whimper.

You were sure you were going to end up dead. That you won't see the new sunset with how your body shivered. Not knowing how life worked or what is bad or good you were a little lamb that waited for hungry wolves to eat her whole.

And maybe one of those predators just saw his next meal. Long strides brought him just in front of you. Your sobs are too loud to make you hear his boots coming closer and closer. His breath just centimeters away from your head, brushing your hair like the not forgotten wind.

“Sweetheart?” It was a calming voice, not too deep but definitely belonging to a grown man. Your posture momentaly stiffened, as your closed eyes now looked at the big leather shoes before you. Your whole body is not moving, only shivering because of the chilly weather and light clothes. It was funny how suddenly you have forgotten about being alone, now wanting just this, wishing for all of this to be a big nightmare.

A deep sight left man's lips reminding you about the realness of the whole situation. You could not move, completely scared, your fingers clutched the bad praying for something to happen. The plan to just act like you were not there, ignoring the man fastly ended, when he sighted once again and crouched just to your eye level.

Deep brown eyes, looking at you with nothing but softness. If you didn’t know better you would say the man looked as if he knew you, cared and was in big relief finding you. But your mother's words echoed in your head, making you believe that every man walking on this planet is bad.

“What are you doing here sweetheart?” Once more this deep voice pierced you. Your mouth opens to answer, deeply knowing that nothing will come out. You just looked in his dark eyes, wishing that maybe he will be the one who can read minds. His eyes now on you, more concerned than before, observing your shivering body.

He was tall and broad for sure, towering over your figure surprisingly even while crouching down. His huge shoulders covered by a creamy coat which now was getting dirty by laying down on a pavement, as it partly hid his expensive looking boots.

Too distracted you didn't notice his hand coming to touch your red cheek, now gently stroking the redness of your skin.

“What a poor soul, so cold and left alone without a coat. Tell me sweetheart would you come and let me warm you a little?”

#poly bts #bts fic rec #bts fanfction #yandere bts #bts ot7 x reader #ot7 x reader #bangta boys #bts x reader #jungkook x reader #yoongi x you #namjoon fanfic #seokjin x oc #hoseok x reader #jimin x reader #taehyung x reader

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darlingbudsofrae · 3 years ago

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Nicky Hemmick Appreciation Post

Foxes Appreciation Series : 1 || 2 || 3 || 4 || 5 || 6 || 7 || 8 || 9 || 10 ||

It’s time for Nicky Hemmick appreciation hours!

I think out of the foxes, I really don’t like the way Nora developed, or lack thereof, Nicky’s character.

He was one of the few POC/LGBTQIAP+ characters in the books and the way he was written just wasn’t it, y’know?

I think out of all the changes we could have, I wish Nora developed him better because his character could’ve gone to so many potentials.

But let’s get with what we have-

First off, I just want to say I appreciate Nicky’s relationship with Erik so much.

They’re adorable.

Now, let’s get to the sad and dark stuff-

Nicky’s past is one of the most messed-up backstories I’ve ever read in my entire life. And I read a LOT of sad books.

Dude literally went to a gay conversion camp (the fact that this shit exists is proof that hell is just a place on earth) for a year and had to repress his sexuality his entire life because his parents were homophobic shitholes.

Repressing his sexuality also led to depression. He had freaking suicidal thoughts and he took the first way out of his problems and saved himself by taking the first chance to leave, aka Germany.

I’m not sure if anyone remembers but to get to that- he had to pretend he was something he was not. He had to play the “perfect son” role because he couldn’t afford to be himself in a place where his existence was deemed wrong.

Also, the fact that he had the capacity to do this- to maintain that role until that Germany ticket landed in his hands while combatting suicidal and other morbid thoughts-

Kid, that sucks. Nicky Hemmick needs a hug.

Also, taking note of this fact makes me appreciate his reactions towards his teammates’ tragedies more.

Like at first I was constantly surprised because I thought it’s such an overreaction to feel sad and almost cry as a reflex to other’s misfortunes (lowkey exposing myself here)

But to realize he went through such a traumatic experience and can still empathize + sympathize deeply with his teammates-

it just makes me really appreciate that aspect of him- to be able to still be that person and have that sense of humanity despite of the horrific things he went though, that’s amazing.

Let’s talk about the fact that Nicky could’ve just live his entire life in Germany with the love of his life and cut off entirely his connections with his family because he had every right to detoxify his life and live happily for himself.

Nicky was about 19-20ish when he learned that Tilda had died and how he reacted to this by going back because he doesn’t want the twins to be raised by the same people who gave him hell- because he knows the twins deserves better- that’s incredible.

He had absolutely no obligation to, he wasn’t even that old to have that responsibility but he took it.

He came back and fought for the rights to become a guardian for the twins (against his own parents), like that takes so much time and effort and the fact that he did it at like a considerably young age is just so mind-blowing.

I’m not going to act like he’s the best guardian. But let’s not discredit where credit is due.

Despite everything- he gave Aaron and Andrew a home. Provided a roof over their heads, helped them at school (he taught them to speak German), worked jobs to provide for their basic necessities, and assuming Andrew spent all that insurance money on the car, someone has to be working to pay the tuition and bills, right?

And that someone was Nicky.

(He also got Andrew and Aaron gigs at where he worked at).

Like no one talks about this enough but Nicky lowkey raised the twins. Like, he actually raised the twins.

There is not enough words in this world to describe how overwhelming and amazing that is.

He had no obligation whatsoever to these two who probably gave him a hard time because as much as I love the Twinyards- they were assholes (I mean they were kind of mean to him for crying out loud, and that’s just on the books- imagine how much more he got back when the twins were probably so distrustful of him) and really, they weren’t Nicky’s obligation because most people forget that Nicky wasn’t that old.

He was pretty young too.

And by going back, he’s associating himself with the things that lowkey broke him but he still went and stayed anyway even when he could’ve easily just be happy and cut it all off because despite of everything, he wanted to provide the twins with an at least better option than his horrible parents.

He wanted the twins to have a good life- literally wished for them to heal and be okay and succeed and that amount of love- it’s just amazing. Like, I said that a lot by now but it’s just really amazing.

Nicky Hemmick is amazing.

He was also supposedly only going to stay until the twins finished high school but then Coach Wymack happened and with Erik’s support and his hopes of the twins being happy, he stayed.

I’m not sure about Nicky’s exy abilities, I think he got scolded a lot by Kevin but I like to think that he wasn’t that bad. I really wish we got more exy contents, that one time I got invested in a sport and there wasn’t even a lot of it.

I also like to believe that he’s more mature than he lets on. Like, he actually knows all that adulting shit.

Also, when Neil noticed that Nicky is just playing his energy levels up to compensate for the Twinyards’ walls because despite everything, he wants to be friends with everyone but can’t because he’s with the monsters and that honestly sucks.

But it’s also commendable that he really tries.

Ignoring the Eden incident aside, he was actually really great to Neil.

Like, he’s one of the few in the foxes that was friendly to him at the start.

He also taught him a lot of things (like social cues and all) and did whatever he can to help him.

He’s actually a pretty good friend.

Also, I lowkey feel for him that despite everything, he still wanted his parents’ validation and approval.

I saw a decent amount of people hate Nicky for this because it was what led to the thanksgiving incident, but I just find it sad.

Because at the end of the day, Nicky was just a son who loved his parents even if they couldn’t love everything he was and the things he stands for, and it’s just sad because even if it was kind of obvious, he just wanted to believe that everything could still mend.

He still wanted to be accepted by them.

Some people don’t deserve to have kids.

But when he realized that it wasn’t going to happen and this brought harm to the twins, he was very apologetic over it and guilty even if it wasn’t his fault, and he chose the twins.

He will always choose the twins.

"It's about family. Not necessarily the one we were born with, but the one we choose. This one. The people we trust to be part of our lives. The people we care about."

Overall, it’s just really amazing that despite everything, he can look for the positive and enjoy life even if it’s really shitty.

Just ✨Nicholas Esteban Hemmick✨ dude.

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yikesharringrove · 3 years ago

Text

Egg the Cat

Chapter 2

Read on Ao3

Nancy flinched as an engine revved, a sleek blue muscle car pulling into the lot.

Steve let himself focus on it. It was better than dwelling on his fucking essay, his impending shitty night spent with Barb’s parents, like he didn’t feel horrible enough about that whole situation.

He watched the car pull into a space at the front of the lot.

California plates.

“Who’s that?” Steve could picture Nancy wrinkling her nose as she said it, too focused on Billy getting out of his car to turn and see it for real.

He narrowed his eyes at a young redhead getting out of the passenger side.

Billy hadn’t said anything about a sibling.

“That’s Billy. I met him last night.” He finally looked back at Nancy as Billy set off towards the school. “He found Egg downtown.”

Nancy’s eyebrows flew nearly to her hairline.

“Steve, I’m sorry, I forgot. Is she okay?”

“Yeah, Billy got her safe and sound. Still don’t know how she got out, though. Let alone made it all the way downtown.” He locked his car as they headed towards the high school, the warning bell sounding through the parking lot.

He reached for Nancy’s hand, his heart soaring when she let him take it.

Sometimes she said his hands were too clammy.

He walked her to her first class, kissing her softly by the door.

Billy glared at the tiny brunette sitting in front of him.

Steve hadn’t said anything about having a fucking girlfriend last night.

And really, Billy should’ve known. He’s a hot guy, living in a town of not a lot of hot guys. It makes sense some girl would snap him up.

It just felt like a slap in the face.

It’s not like Billy thought he actually had a chance with Steve, but now all of his daydreams, any of his dirty thoughts featuring one Steve Harrington were gonna be tainted, by this prissy fucking bitch.

Billy just spent all of his AP biology lecture boring holes into the back of her head.

He didn’t really give a fuck if people noticed, thought it was weird. He was too busy channeling all of his anger, all of his hatred onto this skinny little priss.

He hoped she could feel it, like maybe his anger gaze gave off palpable heat or something.

Based on how many times she stuck her hand up to answer every question posed by the teacher, no, she couldn’t feel the heat of Billy’s rage.

He couldn’t get out of there fast enough, only to find they shared all three of their morning classes.

Because fuck Billy.

And then he had to watch, had to stand there like a stupid gay fucking idiot as Steve lifted nancy off her feet, and made out with her against her locker.

He stomped past, hoping to go unnoticed by-

“Billy!”

Fuck.

He stopped dead in his tracks, taking a few deep breaths before turning, plastering his best I am so charming and I don’t hate your girlfriend for no reason smile on his face.

Steve was all sunshiney again today. Billy mentally kicked the little voice in his head saying that sunshine is for you.

“Hey, man! How’s your first day going?” Steve had his girl tucked under his arm. She looked like a frail little bird. Billy hoped Steve’s cat ate her for breakfast one day soon.

“Well, you got mad at me last night when I called this place a shithole, so I’m just going to heavily imply it.” Steve laughed, his head tipping back a little, eyes crinkling at the corners.

Billy tried to think about his dad, tied to think about the shelf bruises on his back.

And then Steve was pressing a sheet of paper into his hand, and their fingers fucking brushed and Billy tried, tried to think of a broken arm and cops at his house, and not holding fucking hands with Steve Harrington.

He studied the paper, just to look somewhere that wasn’t Steve’s eyes. A lighter shade of brown in the fluorescent lights, a shade bordering on green.

Come and get sheetfaced.

“Hawkins parties will probably be lame compared to what you’re familiar with, but I mean, it should be fun.” Billy just nodded, eyes trained on the little ghost. “We’ll be there. Nancy and I.” Nancy. That’s a stupid fucking name. “Y’know, if you aren’t too cool for us by then.”

Steve was smirking at him a little when Billy finally looked up.

“I’m already cooler than you, Harrington.” Fuck. It sounded way meaner than Billy had wanted, sounded actually rude, not like a little ribbing. Not like a little tongue-in-cheek reference to last night. Cold shit.

But then Steve tossed his head back, and he laughed, a full belly laugh, and he clapped Billy on the shoulder, and Billy has never felt gayer in his entire life.

“Harsh, man. Real harsh. Wait ‘til I tell Egg you said that, she’ll never want to see you again .” And Steve was still smiling at him, and he had maybe, alluded to Billy seeing his cat again, which meant seeing Steve outside of school, and Nancy was looking down the hall, like this conversation was below her pay grade, and Billy wanted.

“See, that’s why I’m cooler than you. I don’t go telling my cat all my lame drama.”

“That’s because you don’t have a cat,” Steve said playfully, his face falling a bit. “Wait, you don’t have a cat, do you?” Billy shrugged.

“Wouldn’t you like to know?” And Steve smiled at him, and the bell rang, and Nancy rolled her eyes before pressing herself out from underneath Steve’s arm, and Steve’s big sweet eyes snapped onto her.

“I’ve got to get to Calculus.” Billy’s heart sank. They shared four classes so far.

Steve just leaned down to kiss her, one hand cradling the side of her face. Billy looked away.

“I love you.” He had to suppress a snort as Nancy said it back, her voice all pitchy and off.

But Steve reached out to clap Billy on the shoulder again.

“I better see you tonight!” And he was off down the hall, and Billy, once again, made a point not to look at his ass.

“You gotta be home by nine-thirty, okay, Shitbird?” Max rolled her eyes again.

“Billy, I know what time I need to be home by.”

“Just making sure, because you know if you don’t make curfew, I’m somehow gonna be blamed for it.” Billy had only gotten out of playing babysitter this evening when Max had nearly thrown a full tantrum at the idea of trick-or-treating with adult supervision while she’s trying to make friends.

She just looked at him sharply, her lips pursing a bit.

“I’ll be home.” Her voice had an edge to it. Billy didn’t really know how to take it.

“Be safe.” She didn’t acknowledge him, just got out of the car, a little Michael Myers heading into the swarm of children.

He pulled down the road, the party address only a few blocks from where Max was meeting her friends.

He slammed a beer the minute he entered the party, didn’t want to be sober for a second of this shitfest.

Steve had been right. This party didn’t hold a fuckin’ candle to what he frequented down in Cali.

He tried to make the best of it, beat the keg stand record, found some stupid jocks that were more than happy to parade around him all night.

He just had to get to that sweet spot, drunk enough he would actually get hard with a girl, but not too drunk he’d get whiskey dick. He didn’t need that to be his reputation in this shitty town.

He was being pulled through the crowd by some freckly fucker dressed as the guy from Karate Kid. Max had made him take her to that movie six times in the theaters. Billy had slept through it every time.

He was feeling pretty okay, the beer settling into his system, giving him a warm buzz as he studied the party. Maybe he could find some punk kids, score some weed or-

Steve Harrington.

The karate guy had shoved him in front of Steve, had said, guess who’s the new Keg King, Harrington?

Steve was glaring at the guy, drawn up to his full height, shoulders squared, all of that melting as he turned to Billy, smiling warmly at him.

Fucking sunshine.

“Nice job, Dude!” And Steve took Billy’s hand, and he pulled him into a one-armed fucking hug.

Billy was absolutely stunned. Maybe a little bit hard as he pat his hand against Steve’s back. Felt his muscles moving under his jacket.

But then Steve pulled back, his eyes trailing after his fucking girlfriend, and he was gone, followed her into the kitchen.

Billy wanted to tear out his fucking hair.

He went the opposite way as Steve, pushing through the sweaty crowd.

He really didn’t need to see Steve coddling his girl.

He shoved his way into the backyard, vaulting the low fence on the porch, making his way out of the yellowed light spilling out of the house.

He pulled out a cigarette, lighting it quickly.

Fucking idiot. You knew you couldn’t have any fucking boy in this goddamn town.

But Billy had come into this town really not expecting any boy to actually catch his eye.

Not like Steve has.

Steve with his stupid big eyes, and his stupid big hair, and his stupid cat named fucking Egg. Who names a cat Egg? That’s a dumb fucking name.

Billy lit his next cigarette with the dying remains of the last one.

He thought about calling it quits, heading home early.

But it wasn’t even ten yet, and really, he needed to fool around with a chick tonight. He needed to establish himself as a lady killer.

Sleep with one girl, and the rumors would build enough that he probably wouldn’t have to fuck any others, just not deny it when any girl claims they had a wild night of passion.

It was safer that way. Gave him some cushion.

Then, if any of the lies began to unravel, he’ll just fuck another one, and let the rumor mill do its trick.

Besides, he can find a brunette, make her take it from behind. If he’s lucky, the party’ll be loud enough he can tune out her moans, picture someone else, picture him -

The backdoor slammed against the wall as someone stomped outside.

Billy just took another deep drag, hoped he wouldn’t be noticed.

But, of course-

Steve didn’t even ask, just took the cigarette out of Billy’s mouth, taking a long fucking drag.

He rolled his shoulders, let his head fall back, blowing the smoke out towards the sky.

“Y’know, I fucking quit smoking because of her. Not like I did it a lot, but still .” Billy just stayed quiet. He really didn’t want to talk about Steve’s fucking girlfriend. “Because I actually cared .” Oh, now wait a minute.

“What happened?”

Steve shot him a dark look.

“You weren’t inside?”

Billy just gestured to the cigarette Steve was now sucking on once again. Billy kept his focus on Steve’s left earlobe. Didn’t care to get a semi just from looking at his lips.

“Lovers’ quarrel?”

“Does repeatedly being called bullshit and having her tell you she doesn’t love you count as a lovers’ quarrel?”

“Ouch.”

“Yeah.” Steve tossed the cigarette to the ground, stomping it out. Billy didn’t know what to say.

What he wanted to say was you ever sucked dick? And then maybe take Steve’s mind off of everything by fucking his face, but that felt a little forward, felt a little gay.

“ Fuck .”

Oh, shit.

Steve was fucking, Steve was gonna cry. Standing outside with Billy, barely lit by the light filtering through the small frosted bathroom window.

“ Next week .” Steve’s voice cracked. “We would’ve been together one year next week. And she was pretending .” Steve slumped back against the wall, his face buried in both his hands. “I, I changed everything for her. I stopped seeing my friends because she didn’t like them, I stopped smoking because she said it was gross, I changed who I am as a fucking person. And you know, granted, I am a better person. But I’m different, because of her, and she just, she threw all of it away.”

He sniffed loudly, his shoulders stuttering.

Billy felt like his guts were on fucking fire.

“Fuck her. Fuck her. You are a good guy. And if she’s too much of a bitch to see that, she doesn’t deserve you.” Steve didn’t acknowledge him for a while. Billy just let it be, lit another cigarette.

“I think I’m gonna go home. I wanna see my cat.” Steve sounded like a little kid. Like a heartbroken little kid.

“You good to drive?” And Steve finally pulled his head out of his hands.

His big eyes were shining, his cheeks wet, glistening in the low light.

“I don’t drink anymore. Because she said I’m an asshole when I’m drunk.”

Billy weighed his words carefully.

“I’ve got a bottle of tequila in my car if you wanna stick it to her.” Steve gave him a watery smile.

“You wanna follow me to my place?”

#clearly i'm very busy at work #yikes writes #egg the cat #harringrove #steve harrington #billy hargrove

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nevermindirah · 3 years ago

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Dorothy Freeman facts

By facts I of course mean headcanons, because Nile's mom doesn't get a first name in canon (or even confirmation that her last name is Freeman). All we know about her is the picture on Nile's phone lock screen (which is Kiki Layne's real-life mom and brother!) and a few lines that Nile tells Andy about her. I’ve been collecting my Dorothy headcanons for a while now to eventually make a post, and @mprosperossprite‘s excellent post giving non-Americans context for what it means that Nile is from the South Side of Chicago prompted me to go ahead and share this. Disclaimer that I’m white and I will absolutely make corrections if it’s pointed out that I’ve caused harm with any of this.

So here have some fun facts about the version of Mama Freeman who lives in my head rent-free:

Her family and growing up:

she was born in the mid-'60s and named after Dorothy Dandridge

I can’t decide whether she was born in Chicago or moved there later on (maybe with Nile’s dad?) and when in the waves of the Great Migration her family left the South

she came of age in the "post"-Civil Rights movement and went to college in the mid-80s when a lot of what are now the foundational classics of Black feminism were being written

she was a young adult when Anita Hill risked so much to report that a Supreme Court nominee had sexually harassed her, and as a result she HATES Joe Biden

Marriage and babies:

she met Nile's father — I can’t decide how they met and I have two competing headcanons for his name, either Gideon for the hefty Biblical masculinity vibes (Giddy for short among family, that man loved to laugh) or Carl, which started out as a shitty Carl’s Jr burger chain joke that turns out to be perfect (it means free man!), and @knoepfchen used it in the sequel to if you do take a thief where Carl is alive!! — and Dorothy was a little skeptical of his near-religious devotion to the military but he was really hot and really devoted to her and they made it work

she's a little pissed that she was right but it's unbearable if she thinks about it too often

it's going to be a long, long time before she can look back on pictures of Baby Nile stomping around the house in her dad's combat boots (this is a Gina Prince Bythewood headcanon, whyyyyyyyy can I not find a link to where she said this)

she named their second baby Indus, Indy for short (this is nearly as established fanon in Book of Nile circles as how much Booker loves eating pussy, and Indy Freeman as a young adult is portrayed by either Aldis Hodge or John Boyega I don’t make the rules)

Work:

Dorothy did some office jobs but nothing really grabbed her, and she was probably gonna have to move for her husband's career, so she decided on teaching — high school humanities

she’s been active in CTU (one of the strongest teacher’s unions in the US) her whole career and one year she was on the bargaining committee and her babies know damn well never to trust a boss, not even one who says all the right things — if she ever finds out the way Nile said "like Quynh?" when Andy promised to protect her, she will lose her mind with pride

(Nile was 18 and freshly graduated from high school in 2012 when CTU went on strike for the first time in a generation and she brought her mom snacks on the picket line)

one of her very favorite things is getting her students to laugh despite themselves at her "oh my GOD you're so EMBARRASSING" old-people jokes

she's one of those teachers who can get 30+ teenagers to go dead silent with judicious application of body language

she's known to occasionally go easy on grading subjective things like essays when she knows students are having a particularly rough time at home, but the second she gets the feeling they're taking advantage and not trying their best that shit is over and they better mind their Ps & Qs

she's the kind of person who says old-people shit like that

she gives her students assignments like "help 5 neighbors register to vote" and "write a compare/contrast table about the candidates in this local election" and "research 5 different ways you could get grant money to do X" and other practical civic-minded shit

standardized testing is her supervillain origin story, just kidding it’s Rahm Emanuel, why the fuck did Obama trust that asshole

After her husband died:

she would have lost her goddamn mind if it weren't for her church friends after her husband died, people from the church raised money so they could make ends meet while his pension paperwork was taking forever, church friends watched Indy so Nile could go out for the soccer team, etc etc

she sold her and her late husband's house and moved to a 3-bedroom co-op unit when Nile started high school, it's more affordable and it meant she didn't have to worry about household repairs in the same way, she can use a wrench if she needs to but she doesn't have time and it just makes her grief flare up (co-op housing has a long history in Chicago and other US cities (like Washington DC where I live) as a way for Black people to access decent, affordable housing in the face of entrenched discrimination)

the move meant putting a longer commute between her and church, but she didn't even bother looking for a church closer to their new home, she loaded the kids into the car on the weekends, parking is hell in their new neighborhood but it's worth giving up a hard-won parking spot to not have to wait so long for the L on Sunday mornings

Indy lived with her through college and he was gearing up to get his own place when Nile died, Dorothy was planning to move into a one-bedroom in the co-op building because she doesn't need so much space anymore, Indy took a day off from his new job (not so new anymore, her baby's so grown!) to help her sort things to donate when those dress-uniform Marines came to their door

part of her wishes she could've been home more and not had to rely on Nile so much for help with Indy, but he's turned out such a kind young man, and he's a much better cook than his sister is (was, oh God — no wait, is! she’s alive! what do you mean you’ve been alive all this time??)

some of the girls from church are encouraging her to check out this social dancing thing, nobody's pressuring her to date but there's definitely been some ribbing, and with Indy out of the house... maybe? probably not, but maybe

Her feelings and beliefs and likes and dislikes:

she's an absolute badass and also she's a soft human woman with lots of feelings

she's very, very traditional in some ways, and part of her mixed feelings about Nile following in her dad's footsteps is gender stuff, she's proud of her daughter and would never stand in the way of what Nile wants to do with her life, and if Nile came home and told her she's a lesbian she would never reject her, but if Nile came home and told her she's bisexual maybe she can just try focusing on men? “I love you sweetheart and I want you to be happy I just know how hard it is already for us in this world” type shit

she has been on team natural hair basically her entire life and one of the worst fights she and Nile ever had was over Nile wanting to straighten her hair as a pre-teen

Indy takes more after her and Nile takes more after their dad, she's so proud of both of them, but Dorothy's activism was mostly wearing her natural hair to work and daring bosses to give her shit, Indy's out there marching in the streets like her parents had and she WORRIES

she teases Indy for going to so many protests like he's using it as an excuse to meet girls, but she WORRIES

when she turns 60, she gets box braids with streaks of dark purple, subtle enough that it's still work-appropriate but it makes her smile, she may be old now but damnit she’s still pretty!

she loves Grey's Anatomy and Star Trek and she watched Bridgerton all in one day

she has a dirty-old-lady celebrity crush on Chris Hemsworth

if she's ever masturbated thinking about Donna Summer, well, that's nobody's business but her own (do non-Americans know about the queen of disco??)

If you want to read fic featuring Dorothy:

I won't have to leave alone, 1000 words, Nile has a nightmare and decides to go tell her family she's immortal

I See Your Eyes Seek a Distant Shore, 65k, Nile adjusts to immortality and does a lot of soul searching about what it means to "do what we think is right", Booker goes to grad school for trauma studies, the working title of this fic was Booker Reads Edward Said and Gloria Anzaldúa and Goes Down on Nile and the final product has an annotated bibliography in the author's notes if you’re into that kind of thing, a lot of my Dorothy Freeman headcanons were born of my process writing this

Gather round the table, we'll give you a treat, 2279 words, college AU, Nile brings her Jewish boyfriend home for Christmas

a contribution I made to Shitty Old Guard Deaths: (Booker, USA, 2025, cause of death: a mother’s righteous wrath)

#nile freeman #nile's family #dorothy freeman #tog headcanons #tog meta #mine #long post

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scarlettriot · 3 years ago

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RichKidKirishima HC

I have opinions on this topic and I just want to get them out in the world.

Warning, it gets sad for a little while.

If you turn your head to the side and squint you might see a tiny bit of KiriBaku and/or KiriMina. Maybe. Sorry but I didn't proof this and I was kinda sleepy when I wrote it. Still hope you like it though!

So, I think Eijiro's parents had a decent amount of money, probably worked good jobs. I don't think they were Yaoyorozu's rich but probably somewhere along the lines of Todoroki's. What they did exactly, I'm not sure of either but I like to think high-class event coordinators (this is a HC after all).

Rolling with the event coordinator's idea... after planning a lavish gala for the top heroes, they were on their way home to pick up little Eijiro when a tragic event happened and they were killed. Everything they had was left to their only child at just six years old.

But, Eijiro wouldn't be all alone. His aunt might have only been 19 and she certainly wasn't ready to be a parent but she wasn't going to let her only nephew become an orphan. She took him in and raised him on her own. Most of his parent's money had been put away until Eijiro reached a certain age but his aunt was granted access to make sure he could go to the best school and live a comfortable life.

...

His aunt did the absolute best she could to raise him and she thinks she's done a pretty good job thus far even though she's convinced most of it is just because Eijiro is a truly good person at heart.

Even though money was never really a problem for them, she still worked two jobs to make sure Eijiro would have as much of the inheritance his parents left for him as possible when he became an adult.

So many nights she'd fall asleep on the sofa with her work uniform and shoes still on. She would wake up in the morning to find the shoes sitting by the front door and a blanket over her and the world's sweetest nephew in the kitchen making breakfast (usually cereal or peanut butter toast) while watching highlight reels of his favorite Pro Hero, Crimson Riot.

She took advantage of a rare night off when Eijiro was ten to go out on a date... it didn't go well, to say the least. She hoped her nephew would be asleep when she came home so she could properly cover up the black eye she received and clean up her knuckles but he was up watching a holiday special in his pajamas when she opened the front door.

Little Eijiro FLIPPED the moment he saw her injured. He tried pulling her back out the door wanting her to go to the hospital but she insisted she'd be alright. The furious ten-year-old then went around the kitchen gathering an ice pack and carefully wrapping it up in a towel for her. He sat on her lap and pressed it oh so gently to her eye muttering about how the man was a super unmanly guy for hitting a girl.

When she chuckled and took the ice pack from him he noticed her blooded knuckles too, "I can take care of myself, little shark." He hopped off her lap and ran to get the first aid kit to a much different tune.

"I HAVE THE MANLIEST AUNTIE EVER!"

He did insist on meeting all of her future dates after that. Something she avoided up until that point because being not even 25 with a ten-year-old had a way of making dating...challenging. She agreed to his terms though, this was right around the time his protective nature began to kick in. Eijiro always wanted to do the right thing even if he didn't know how.

She remembered Eijiro feeling insecure as he reached his early teen years. Feeling like he wasn't enough, not strong enough to help people and she wished like hell her brother was still alive to help. Eijiro wouldn't really talk to her about his problems, he'd just smile and tell her everything was alright. She started to get really worried but then something in him changed.

He was suddenly asking her if he could buy a heavy bag and if he could sign up for a gym membership, wanting to take boxing classes. Of course, she supported it and when he told her he wanted to go to UA and become a Pro Hero, she couldn't have been more proud.

He had a friend to train with, a young girl who pushed him to be his best and he was pushing right back! A real friend. It was all she could have wanted for him. The cheers that filled her living room when the pair found out they'd both be attending UA were enough to make her cry.

She would be a nervous wreck but that came with being a parent...

A very proud, absolutely terrified parent who couldn't wait to see the amazing things her little shark would do.

...

Eijiro was old enough when the tragedy occurred that he remembers his parents, his mother's smile, and his father's booming laugh. He'd give all the money back they left for him if it meant having his parents back and that's why he never flaunts that he has any. He hates where it came from.

It isn't until he starts making really close friends that he starts to spend some of the money on them without a second thought.

He'd do little things like paying for their ice cream after school with Mina which she would thank him over and over for. He'd also buy her big things like tickets to a concert he knew she couldn't afford on her own. Seeing the pure joy and excitement on her face was more than enough to know he was doing something he could feel good about.

He liked being able to spontaneously buy things for his friends when he got to UA. It was a way for him to think of the money he was given without feeling upset and shitty about it.

And when Bakugo was taken, when he wasn't there to do anything to help in that moment and he instantly felt like he was six years old, weak and helpless with nothing he could do to protect his friend, Eijiro remembered he could do something.

He used a small portion of his allowance to buy the goggles hoping it would make rescuing Bakugo easier. It made more sense to him to spend it on things to help others and that was what he did. His money wasn't just there to buy gifts but he could also use it to buy tools and resources.

He would fight tooth and nail to protect the ones he cared about. Spend every coin he had if it meant keeping them safe as well as happy.

...

Eijiro had full access to his inheritance when he was 18 but he didn't touch it. He relied solely on what he made as a pro hero. Got himself an apartment that he shared with Tamaki and Tetsutetsu.

The first time he accessed the funds was when his auntie told him she was pregnant. He was going to be a big brother. And he was going to spoil the crap out of this little kid!

In his twenties, he began donating some of the funds away. He made plenty as one of the top ten pro heroes anyways. Enough to support his own growing family as well as making sure his auntie had whatever she needed. He always lived well below his means, never taking a single thing for granted.

He knew better than anyone what it was like to have something you care for so much vanish in an instant.

Eijiro couldn't remember too much of his parents anymore but, if he closed his eyes, he could still see his mother's smile and hear his father's boisterous laugh, both of which they passed onto him.

They gave him the means to make something great with his life even if they weren't physically with him anymore and for that, he'd always be thankful.

#mha headcanons #bnha hcs #bnha eijiro kirishima #kirishima hcs #kiribaku #thiswasarollercoastertowrite #im in my feels #eijiro kirishima #kirimina #kiribaku fluff #kirimina fluff

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ironmandeficiency · 4 years ago

Text

rain clouds

pairing: maxwell lord / reader

word count: 2813

summary: i don’t even know what to say abt this one except it’s filled with yearning

a/n: this was gonna be super soft and happy but then it got soft and sad and then soft and happy again. posting from mobile yet again. tbh idek if this makes a lick of sense, we will see

warnings: mentions of shitty parents (maxwell’s dad & alistair’s mom), hints at child neglect & cps, anxious max, don't worry it gets fluffy

maxwell lord hasn’t had a day off since he founded black gold cooperative. that business was his baby long before he had a living baby with his ex wife, and loved both just as much. there was no such thing as a “sick day” to max; any day spent sleeping or healing is a day lost in the pursuit of greatness, the pilgrimage to the top of the corporate food chain. the only one he would ever make an exception for is alistair, and even then work would sometimes interrupt.

there was a time, almost too long ago for him to vividly remember, where maxwell did more than work. when he actually got his hands dirty in something that didn’t have anything to do with corporate schemes, and laughed with genuine glee more often than scowled. it was a long time ago now, and no one would ever believe it if they were told that maxwell lord ever got dirty with, well, dirt.

“come on! you gotta try this, it’s great!” the memories of his only friend have become worn with constant reminiscing, his mind unsure as to what’s real and what he imagined to fill in the gaps left by age and new priorities.

maxwell had found a secluded section of the park down the street from the apartment you both lived in, one safe from the eyes of bullies and adults alike. his feet were bare as the day he was born while making leaps and bounds in the abundant mud puddles from yesterday’s rain. he did his best to not let what little joy he found be dwindled by circumstance — his shitty father and reticent mother and the lingering ghost of poverty — the way others lost theirs. max believed himself different than that and carried himself as such no matter what others said.

you were still on the sidewalk, watching your best friend with awe and curiosity. the idea of traipsing through mud barefooted was exhilarating, but you knew that if your clothes got dirty, your mother would hang you out to dry alongside the clothes you were wearing. how did it feel to have the mud between your toes, the rainwater soaking into your skin? you didn’t remember, but you would like to.

to be honest, maxwell didn’t expect you to join him. he didn’t think you would ever try to break out of the box of propriety your family shoved you in, not now or ever. but the next thing he knew, he heard another set of feet splashing around in the puddles he had just vacated, making a path to where he stood. a playful shriek he knew as yours rang through the air and he immediately turned to you, wanting to see your face as you enjoyed yourself for the first time in a long time. “maxwell, this is wonderful! why didn’t you get me to do this earlier?”

you never looked more beautiful to him than when the afternoon sun shone on you, your smile bright and laughter clear and joyous. you were free as lady liberty, splashing around like there wasn’t a single other thing you had to do. then you take his hand and max swears that he’s seeing stars. before you know it, you’re dancing in the mud to the song of the birds in the trees. is it just max’s imagination, or do you tell him you love him?

your lips are on his and it’s magic. his shirt is being gripped in tight fists and his hands are magnetized to your waist, holding each other tight enough to need a crowbar to separate you. there’s nowhere he would rather be than back there with you…

but it’s been far too many years since he’s seen or heard from you, there’s no telling if you’re even in the country still at this point. it took a long time for him to not dolefully gaze at every door you could walk through once he left for college, hoping to see that radiant smile and hear you say his name so reverently.

but these days, reverence is the last thing maxwell thinks he deserves, not after the dreamstone debacle. hell, he isn’t even completely convinced that he can adequately take care of alistair despite the low standards his father and his ex-wife have presented him with. despite these doubts (and the perplexing way that everyone acted as if he never almost took over the world), he was just given full custody of alistair when the school called cps on his ex-wife for neglect. it was a terrible way to get a second chance at doing right by his son, but it’s a second chance nonetheless.

after seeing sense and liquidating black gold while he still could get something to survive with, he and alistair found a two bedroom apartment in a nice part of town. it was miniscule compared to what he had but it was a sight more than what he could have ended up with. besides, max had no time to be frivolous when he had his son to protect.

back to the grindstone he went. he knew that people would recognize him if he kept his current appearance and name, so he retired the lord name and decided on another fresh start. he slowly adjusted to using lorenzano after so many years rejecting it, got the blond removed from his hair. he found a job in financial advisory, and ironically enough, he was damn good at it. he knows what he’s doing when it comes to money that isn’t his, who’d have thought?

he actually knew a couple people from work that he almost considered friends. honestly he wasn’t sure what that word meant anymore, didn’t remember the feelings that were supposed to be associated with having them. but it was enough, truly more than enough; because this progress meant that he was dragging himself out of the grave he dug, because he was taking care of his son first and foremost.

alistair was put into a new school; nothing fancy, just the nicer public school that was a pleasing midpoint between work and their apartment. the first day he attended, alistair came home with so many good stories about the friends he made and the games they played at recess. within a few months he had been contacted by his teacher who had nothing but praise for little alistair lorenzano. his little boy was excelling and max couldn’t have been more proud than he was during that phone call. seconds after he hung up, he found alistair in his bedroom and wrapped him in a massive hug, making sure to emphasize the fact that max was proud of his son.

and then there was his neighbor. they lived across the hall from him and max would only catch the tail end of their arrivals and departures to their apartment. he did think it was rather odd, their strangely adept ability at avoiding him. if he didn’t know any better he’d think it was on purpose.

it wasn't intentional — not quite.

you had been avoiding your neighbor, but it had nothing to do with the oil commercials or dreamstone debacle — your new neighbor made you sad. the feeling would hit every time you saw him. his mere presence dusted off long-worn and cherished memories of a time where the sun felt warmer on your skin, where smiles came easier than heartache.

it took a long while before you realized why: it was because this mystery man reminded you of a love long lost to the dagger of circumstance. something about his walk, or maybe his hands during the times you’d see him open his apartment door, reminded you of what an older maxwell lorenzano could have been. the section of your heart that housed your thoughts of maxwell had been wrapped in caution tape with every hazard sign known to man flashing around it for many years, not wanting to venture there for more than a few moments in fear of hurting yourself even more.

if only you realized it was really max that you were so adamantly avoiding.

three months went by of max wondering why he still has yet to meet his neighbor. not that it was imperative to his daily survival, but his curiosity was all but tearing him apart at the seams. he didn’t know what else to do; yes he wanted to know his neighbor, but how did he go about that when they never saw each other?

“just knock on their door, daddy. be their friend, like you tell me to do when i go to school.” the childlike innocence alistair speaks with betrays the actual feasibility of the idea. maxwell was overthinking everything! people talked to their neighbors all the time! this could just be a simple “hey are you doing okay?” and the chips would fall where they may.

maxwell ruffles his son’s hair affectionately, pulling him into a small hug. “you know what? that’s exactly what i’m gonna do. thanks buddy, i’ll be right back.” it’s only across the hall, max isn’t gonna be gone long.

it’s been years since he’s done anything this casually daring. everything he did for decades was all high risk yielding high reward. talking to his neighbor should seem simple in comparison — it presented no drastic consequence if it went belly up, he almost never saw his neighbor anyway. that wouldn’t change after he finally sated his curiosity, certainly not.

once alistair’s homework is finished and is entranced by the television, maxwell decides to head next door, being sure that the house keys are in his pocket before shutting the door. he probably should have thought it out more than he did — he had no idea about his neighbor’s work schedule or if they had kids or a spouse, if they were a serial killer or an introvert. or even worse, if they happened to be someone who remembers everything he’s done. that would be his luck, his first true attempt at making a friend being thwarted with the magnitude of his past sins.

he doesn’t hear his own front door open, alistair’s head poking out to watch his dad. “knock, daddy!” he whisper-shouts and nearly shakes maxwell out of his skin. the little boy laughs at his dad’s startled expression before nodding and shutting the door back.

max went to knock but realized with his knuckles only an inch from the wood that his hands were peculiarly slippery. when did maxwell’s hands get so clammy? there was nothing to be nervous about. he was just going to attempt to make a friend, like his son simplified.

but the thing is, maxwell knows that it’s been decades since he’s had a friend. the last time someone outside of his son was kind to him not for the zeroes he wrote in checkbooks was you, and sometimes he even doubted that you were real. there are hazy memories of him as a teen that splashed in mud puddles and kissed a being of pure sunshine with the innocence of youth. he hopes they’re real, for his sake and for the sunshine he romped around the park with. maybe memories of him are keeping you sane the way your memory did for him.

as his thoughts spiraled, maxwell lost his nerve. with a heaping dose of irrationality, he didn’t want to disappoint whoever was on the other side of the door. turns out, there was no one on the other side.

“excuse me, did you need something?”

your first instinct when seeing a man almost knocking on your apartment door, on a normal day, was not to be so polite. but you were having a strangely good day and there was no reason to bring down the positive energy with an abrasive attitude. plus, the man looked so conflicted. he seemed to need a friend.

“i, uh, live across the hall, have been for a few months and never got to meet you.” a small gesture to the side shifted your attention to the door across from yours — and the little boy who had the door cracked just enough to see the interaction between you and who you think must be his dad.

this man’s voice, something about it was familiar. he moved from in front of your door and extended his hand towards you in an effort for a decent introduction. “i’m maxwell lor-lorenzano.”

maxwell lorenzano. you never would have thought that out of all the people to have graced this apartment building, he would be one. his hands were still softly strong and shoulders still broad. his eyes were still the same striking shade of brown, but there was a lot more pain there, a lot of experience that was clearly pushing him down by his shoulders and into the depths of anguish. yet there he was, keeping his head above water and still being kind. this truly was your max.

you take his hand with a soft smile, squeezing it gently as you give your name. “it’s been a long time, max.”

max couldn’t believe it. after all these years, it was you.

you had moved in across the street from him in his early teenage years and had become acquainted when walking to school and home. the two of you trekked through high school together, ignoring the cruelty of classmates and focusing on getting to the future, to freedom. hope of being friends after high school was abundant in the beginning, but soon your paths sent you further and further away from each other and towards a future neither of you were sure you wanted without the other.

“it really has been a while. i- i uh,” he could barely string a sentence together anymore. his shock and joy of seeing you again had his brain melting into goo and his tongue an almost immovable weight. “i missed you.” the blood rushed to your face the way it always did when you were with max. even when stuttering over his words and a hand rubbing at the back of his neck, he was still charming.

max noticed your attire and the wet umbrella in hand and was immediately taken back to that day spent in the park after it rained, when he . the sunshine on his skin, your smile that never failed to take his breath away…

a soft smile was on max’s lips but his eyes were somewhere else. “max? is everything okay?”

“do you remember the day we went to the park, when we splashed in the puddles and-“

“and when i kissed you? i could never forget if i tried.”

you really did kiss him! it made him want to do it again, as many times as you would let him. but that brought one little stipulation with it: alistair.

what would you say when you found out he had a son?

before max’s thoughts could dampen your reunion, you continued, and with every word, you solidified your place in his heart. “maybe we could do that again some time, just like we used to. and you could bring your son too, if you’d like.” you were jumping out on a limb by assuming that the little boy was his son, but with the apparent protectiveness max displayed around him when you see them together, what else could he be?

“that sounds so fun! can we, dad?” alistair made his presence known by pummeling into max’s legs, nearly knocking him over with an excited hug. you grinned at the affection, watching max’s eyes fill with warmth as he gazed at his son. “i don’t see why not. just change into some play clothes and get your raincoat from the hall closet.”

alistair shoots with glee and is immediately running back to the apartment, excited to change clothes and play in the rain. you watch max’s eyes as they light up at alistair’s happiness, that flicker reminding of you of when you were younger and the world was kinder to you both.

here was your second chance with max, another opportunity to be with someone who never stopped loving you even as the seasons changed and the zeroes increased. “i’ll let you guys get changed, come knock when you’re ready to go.”

feeling an uptick in bravery, max placed a quick peck to your cheek before he turned toward his apartment. “will do, see you in a few.” the risk he took was well worth seeing you grow bashful at the affection, eyes flitting to your shoes before back at him, a soft smile across your lips. you watched him walk away before going back into your apartment, waiting for the rest of your life to begin at the rapping of knuckles on solid oak.

maxwell lord taglist & others: @phoenixhalliwell @likeshootingstarsinthenightsky @obirain @themarcusmoreno @captainrexstan @battletales @stardustsunrisekisses @senator-nahberries @max--phillips @jedi-mando @veracruz-djarin @andysficrecs @purelypascal @whovianwar @iv7867 @kaermorons @princess76179 @pedropasscals

#maxwell lord x reader #maxwell lord reader insert #maxwell lord imagines #emotional support capitalist #maxwell lord #pedro pascal #i’m soft #i’m not sure what this is but i hope y’all like it #ww84

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barbasbodaciousbeard · 4 years ago

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The One with the Engagement Picture

Ayy, using this to try new ones. Another for @thatesqcrush’s FRIENDS challenge.

Peter Stone hadn’t always been as much of a partier as he’d become, and he would certainly reject the term womanizer. Anyone he dated or slept with knew that he just wasn’t ready to settle down anymore. Maybe it was because he’d tried to do that once and ruined it. When he tore his ulnar collateral ligament, he’d accepted he wouldn’t be pitching anymore, and slowly an ocean seemed to settle between himself and his teammates. He was bitter, and they were busy. As the partying stopped for him to heal and return to school, there was one woman he found himself content to spend nights with on the couch with. It was the first time since he’d been an adult that Peter was in a serious, monogamous relationship, and he thought it suited him.

Dahlia had moved to Chicago for graduate school, and she was thoroughly unimpressed with his baseball background. Did she think it was cool? Sure. Was she understanding they’d be going to games? Yes. But, he had to teach her how the game worked and let her know which of his friends even played when she met them. She was more interested in dragging him antique shopping or to old bookshops where he’d have to keep her from falling off of a ladder. While she learned his world, Peter got far more comfortable than he ever expected to with pin curls, vintage compacts, and inspecting dresses for sweat stains or cigarette burns. It made her happy to invest time in it, so if she’d wear his old jersey tucked into her high waisted jeans and go to a game with him, he’d take pictures of his pin up at the rockabilly festival they drove out to.

When he proposed, he was nauseatingly proud to find a mid century ring at the vintage jewelry store she loved. The owner knew him from each time he had followed her through, shopping bags in hand as she purused. That meant he had help from a woman who knew Dahlia’s ring size and which cut she’d like the most; he picked correctly anyway, she’d said. He’d been careful to plan an outing to the park, packing a picnic and red and white checked blanket. He had a friend hiding to capture pictures, and it felt like the timing was perfect. Soon enough, he had a picture of her, hand over her mouth as he asked her to marry him sitting on his desk at home, and one with her showing off the ring as she pressed a kiss to his cheek, his arms slung around her waist, sitting on his office desk.

Things were easier then, when he was working and she was in school. Their schedules still aligned, so they could see each other in the evenings. Then, she finished her MFA and taught night classes in order to make ends meet while she worked on her next novel. They’d met not long before the first was published, and he’d read a preview copy the first weekend he knew her and dug up poetry she’d published in volumes stored at the university. His brain didn’t work like that and he liked that about her. He was more about practicality and comfort. She was creative and artistic, comfort be damned.

The change in schedules made things hard. Peter wasn’t good when things got hard. The transition to not seeing each other much during the week, even though they lived together, quickly coupled with wedding planning stress to create arguments they hadn’t had before. Instead of quiet togetherness, they’d bicker. He got home late, so they didn’t see each other before she left to teach. She had to pick something up after work, so he was asleep when she got home. Dahlia wanted to plan the wedding, and Peter was getting nervous because he hadn’t watched many marriages stay happy. He pushed off decisions, avoided picking a venue. After a while, she got an offer to teach creative writing in New York.

“I could have normal hours, Peter. We could see each other. You know you’d get a job in New York.”

“I’m not going back there, Dahl.”

“It’s a big city. You wouldn’t even have to see him. We wouldn’t even have to tell Ben, would we?”

“No.”

“So we just keep not planning a wedding and not seeing each other? Do you even want to marry me?”

“You know I do.”

“No I don’t!”

“Then maybe you should take the fucking job without me.”

The minute he said it, he regretted it. The way Dahlia’s face fell and tears came made him feel stupid. She’d spent her weekends helping him with physical therapy. She’d taken the shitty adjuncting job to stay in Chicago until he was a little more established. She was patient about maneuvering the strained dynamic between Ben and Peter Stone. Hell, she wasn’t even asking him to go back to New York forever. It was a year and then the university would evaluate if they’d offer her a permanent position. They could be back in Chicago after a year. And now she was crying. He hadn’t made her do that before, not because she was sad.

“Fine,” she managed, jaw shifting as she tried to get the tears to stop. “I’ll go then. I can’t keep doing this. You won’t plan the wedding. We fight all the time. And now you want me to go? Here’s your fucking ring.”

If Peter had been used to having a girlfriend or wanting her to stay, Peter might have developed the skills required to do more than stare as Dahlia shoved her clothes into a suitcase and clutch the ring in his outstretched hand. He might have thought to fly to the city when he realized she’d actually gone ahead and moved and show up at her apartment unemployed and ready to go to the courthouse to prove he needed her there.

Instead, he steeled his jaw over the next few weeks. His arm had healed the first year of law school, so he simply returned to his circle of friends that went out and dated whoever and covered for each other. He always ignored the ones in a vintage dress or with dark curled hair. Those were the ones who could hurt him. Who let him pretend afterwards that it was Dahlia beside him, and they were married and happy.

When he moved out the apartment they’d shared-it was too much there now- he picked a painfully modern place and filled it with sleek modern furniture, The antiques she hadn’t taken were sold, and he finally felt that maybe he’d scrubbed his life of Dahlia, save the engagement pictures he kept in the top drawer of his desk. She had probably responded to the break up like an actual adult and moved on. Had a husband and career. Maybe even a baby. He hated the thought, so when he thought it, he’d pour another drink. And it was fine, because he’d just distanced himself from everything that could make him think of her. And that was fine, really it was. Peter had been a playboy before. He was a partier. He was an ex-baseball player. And he was fine.

Then his father died.

Peter felt the solitude then. There hadn’t been anything new and hard to process since Dahlia left. He wandered New York and wondered if she was still there somewhere or if she’d gotten another teaching job somewhere. When McCoy convinced him to take the ADA position after Baba’s trial, he couldn’t say no, and one of the engagement photos found a new home in the top drawer of his new desk. SVU was harder, and it found its way out more. He’d hold it in his free hand, sipping a drink as he tried to channel the advice she’d have given him.

“Ben liked her,” Jack said softly one day. “He had a copy of that picture until the engagement ended.”

“I was an idiot.”

“Aren’t we all at some point? Learn from it.”

Peter left it out after that. It faced him from the corner, and he remembered feeling grounded. That was what he really missed. Dahlia had given him a place to land. His dad had always felt unstable, and he wasn’t close with his mom. He wasn’t even always at home, staying with his aunt periodically. And then he’d made a happy stable home with Dahlia and ruined it.

When Pamela died, he stopped partying for fun and started using it to numb himself, but one night, he met a woman with dark brown pin curls and fair skin. She’d left when Dahlia’s name fell from his lips. That’s when he knew he had to reach out. He had to know if there was a family or a set of kids or a job in another city. He needed closure.

“Hello?” She sounded confused when she answered, and he suddenly remembered it was nearly midnight. He also remembered she never checked caller ID. Oh God, or she’d deleted his number.

“Dahlia?” Papers stopped shuffling and he could hear her sharp intake of breath. He could almost picture her, perched in an armchair, probably a yellow velvet one, with wide eyes and hair pinned up for the night and tied in a silk scarf as she graded or proofed her own manuscript. Maybe it was a friend’s manuscript.

Oh God, what if it was a husband’s manuscript. Another writer. She’d like that.

The cool metal of the picture he kept at home was pressed into the skin of his palm before he whispered, “Dahl, it’s Peter.”

“I know,” she said softly. “You don’t sound okay.”

“I’m not.”

“What happened?”

“Pamela.”

“What happened to Pamela? I can be on a plane to Chicago if you need someone. Or if you need help in the city, I can arrange things. Check on her.”

“How do you know I don’t have someone?”

“Would you be calling if you did?”

“I’m in New York. Where did you end up?”

“They offered me a permanent position. How long have you been in the city?” He could tell she was trying to mask hurt that he hadn’t called before now. But what was he supposed to say? Dad’s dead so I live here now.

“Since January. Dad died. I prosecuted an ADA. Then I took his job.”

“Ben’s gone?”

“So is Pam.”

“Pam’s gone?” He let out a shaky breath, chest tight. “Send me your address.”

“You don’t have to--”

“Address or I start calling your baseball buddies.”

“I’ll text it.”

“I’m not hanging up until I’m there.”

“Is it creepy I keep the engagement photo on my desk?”

“We’re not touching that right now Peter. You’re drunk and not okay.”

She was true to her word, not hanging up the phone until she arrived at his apartment. When he opened the door, he saw her just as he’d imagined her. Her hair was pinned in the silk scarf and a silk robe was tied over her pajamas. She had thrown it on over the same babydoll top and short sets she’d always been hunting down patterns for so she could make them herself and she’d slid on flats.

The sight of her made him feel tethered again, though he had had enough more to drink between the initial call and her arrival that he had gone from tipsy to unsteady. He went to hug her, and Dahlia carefully kicked the door close, locked it, and maneuvered him to his big leather couch that she looked terribly out of place on.

“Let it out, Peter,” she whispered, and he buried his face into the crook of her neck like she might float away or vanish. The cry wasn’t like anything he’d let her see before. He’d been careful and controlled anytime something hurt, glossing over details that could make it worse to give her a pig picture. But now, he cried like he was alone, heaving sobs with snot and tears and drool as he clutched her.

She settled into the couch enough he was basically curled in her lap. That’s how he woke the next morning too, curled against her torso with his head on her shoulder. She’d fallen asleep with her cheek pressed against the top of his head, and he was both embarrassed and relieved she was still there. Carefully he untangled himself from her, wanting to clean up before he had to face her. Face the fact it was his own fault he’d had to deal with it all alone.

He came out to find her having obviously used the guest bathroom to rinse her face, though she was clad in his boxers and henley now. She was too averse to pants for his sweats. And like the angel she was, Dahlia was cooking. He was, however, mortified to see what she was holding as whatever she’d put in the oven cooked was the engagement photo he’d been clinging to when he called. But he could also see she seemed to be looking at it fondly.

“Your interior design is terrible,” she teased gently, setting the frame aside. “I left you so much of the good stuff.”

“I couldn’t bring it from Chicago.”

“Peter, you forget I brought it from Chicago.”

“When I looked at furniture we found together, it made me miss you, so I got rid of it.”

“I kept mine because it made me remember you.”

“I’m the one that was an absolute moron.”

“It was easier then, huh?” she said softly, picking the picture up again. Their smiles were wider. There were fewer lines on their faces. Ben and Pam were in New York alive, and Dahlia and Peter had forever in front of them. Peter didn’t need to talk to her about something he didn’t want to remember.

“Yeah,” he whispered, leaning against the kitchen counter. “I’m sorry I let you go.”

“I’m sorry I let you. I shouldn’t have left the first time we fought. I knew how you were.”

“You were right to. I went for what I knew would hurt.”

“We can address all of that later. For right now, do you want to start talking or eat and then talk?”

“It’s my fault Pam’s dead.”

“You need to elaborate on that one, Peter. Because I’m sure there is more happening than you’re saying.”

“I didn’t drop a case. A victim tortured her attacker. We didn’t know for sure at first. A cartel was involved and they threatened to hurt Pam if I didn’t drop the case. We had guards, but they massacred Pam’s facility and took her. Diaz killed her in the gunfire. Dahl, she recognized me. She called for me, and he killed her. It’s been months, and I just, I feel so lost.”

“Peter,” she whispered, pulling him close.

He stiffened at first. He’d expected disgust, not sympathy. This was his fault. That’s what he’d been telling himself for weeks, distracting himself with booze and bars and women like he had done when he wanted to pretend his family was fine, that Pam wasn’t sick, that he was close with his dad. This time though, the hurt was bigger.

He was crying into her shoulder again, and he suddenly wished he’d been smart enough to call the minute he’d arrived. That she’d been there at dad’s funeral and for the trial of Rafael Barba. Maybe then he wouldn’t have even taken the job. He’d have recognized something bad was brewing. Instead he’d gotten his sister killed and was clinging to Dahlia in the early morning light of his kitchen.

“It happened in May.”

“Why didn’t you call sooner?”

“I didn’t mean to call now.”

“How have you been coping?” He was quiet, shifting awkwardly. “Baseball methods?”

“Yeah.” He was ashamed to tell her, and she squeezed him gently.

“I went with baseball methods after we split. You’re a single man. I don’t like the thought and it’s not healthy, but it’s better than other things you could’ve done.” They didn’t speak much as they ate. Neither one knew what to say to the other any more, but she didn’t want to leave him alone and he shouldn’t be left alone. When he did speak again, his voice was gentler than it had been in a while.

“Can we go antiquing?”

“You want to go?”

“I want to carry your bags and think about sweat stains.”

“How does that help you?”

“Is it manipulative if I say that’s the last time I was really happy? Because if you say no I won’t be mad. It’s just true.”

“It could be. But I believe you. I think it’s the last time I was really happy too.”

“Really?”

“Depends? Did I pretend to understand baseball between our last antiquing trip and moving?”

“No. You moved in the off season.”

“Then really. Don’t get me wrong. I’ve been fine. I love work. I love writing. I love the city. But I like everything more with you. Even if you’re a jock.”

“I thought I was happy before you. But I wasn’t.”

“You have to take me home first so I can get ready.”

“Deal.” And that’s what found him in her living room while she got dressed. He wasn’t stupid; Dahlia was the same as she’d always been, so he was waiting patiently as she brushed out her set curls and did her make up. She came back out in a pretty shirtdress, one he felt sure he’d found for her a long time ago, and keds, and Peter knew he’d do anything to get this back. The feeling of groundedness, that maybe they could be a team again, awe she was even agreeing to comfort him on any level.

She led him through new vintage shops now. They were in a whole new state after all. He decided that maybe baseball methods didn’t work, and he talked to Dahlia. This time he really talked though. He’d brushed over stories about his father and Pam. He didn’t like the bad ones or the feelings they could bring up. Besides, Ben Stone was a saint, didn’t you know? Peter hadn’t ever been talk about his father, so he kept that habit up with Dahlia the first time. He also told her the truth. He’d panicked over marrying her because she was his first real girlfriend and the prospect of settling down and having her grow to hate him like his mother had his father scared him. That one was a revelation to her.

He’d basically moved in with her a month after their outing to go antiquing. She preferred their old furniture and her vintage collection. Besides, Peter, I have a built in vanity here! The engagement photo in the park was replaced on his desk a year later. It showed them now in a different park in a different city with different lives to the ones so long ago. They also had different methods of communication, meaning they’d weathered fights as they adjusted to things again. The same ring was on display, however, and the same smile was plastered on Peter’s face as Dahlia pressed a kiss to his cheek.

#thatesqcrushFriends #peter stone x reader #peter stone #peter stonex oc #law and order #law and order svu #law and order special victims unit

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meichenxi · 4 years ago

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*rant commencing*

ok guys let’s sit down and have a think about the way we talk to kids, particularly neurodivergent ones, and the weight it carries

the other day, I opened up to a friend about something really hurtful my best (and only) friend said to me when I was fifteen. It was a moment of emotional intimacy and the first time I had brought it up seven years later and, once again, I got laughed at and told I was too fucking sensitive

and ok maybe yeah I was a ridiculous child. I’m a ridiculous adult, that shouldn’t be surprising. But this hurt and hurt and hurt and I was trying to think about why this in particular and not anything else was so painful

so here’s the situation. at fifteen, like many smart kids, everyone thought the world was open to me. Ok I had no social skills to speak of and was ostracised by teachers and students and family, but I was an optimistic kid, and in a disaster of a home situation (involving kidnappings and court cases and running away and being out of school for a year and a brother starting drugs at 12 and living in a shelter and basically just a LOT) I was always the smiley helpful one. and apart from being defeated by very simple mechanisms like idk drawers or biscuit packets, I picked things up quickly. I took GCSEs early and extra and tutored others; I was a regional competitive swimmer in breaststroke and open water; I taught myself the flute and got into an international touring youth orchestra without lessons; I won a poetry competition for adults in primary school; I played competitive netball and was a long distance runner; I drew and sold my art; I wrote shitty novels and started making conlangs and was interviewed on bbc world about it; I loved performing and was invited to join a theatre company when I left school; and my biggest passion in the entire world apart from Tolkien was martial arts. And the best thing was for my parents - one of whom was disabled and didn’t work and the other who was a cleaner - is that I worked two paper rounds and tutored younger children and earned all of the money for it myself. blah blah blah. I was your mum’s friend’s kid.

well, I’m a disaster adult, so you can probably guess that none of that lasted for very long. and there are gazillions of people here with exactly the same story.

the point in question, though, was when I was fifteen and thinking about sixth form (the last two years of school in the UK) it was becoming clear alarmingly fast that you weren’t allowed to just keep doing everything you loved. at some point you had to make a choice.

but how could I give up swimming for music? Or music for languages? Or languages for athletics? Or athletics for theatre? or, actually, all of them but one???? how did people just know what they had to do with their lives? how did they choose?

the problem was, I said to my friend, I know I could do well at any of them, so how was I supposed to choose? (tactless and a stupid thing to say and also just not true but I was fifteen and simultaneously disgustingly cocky and cripplingly insecure) And he laughed and said, well, fuck you then.

oh noooo. poor meeeeeee. I’m so fucking good at things what do I dooooo

I haven’t stopped thinking about that comment for seven years. Every single time I think about wasting my potential, every time I can’t sleep because I’m terrified that I’m not being productive or useful and hating myself because I’m upset that I can’t do something right away and I know it’s a stupid thing to be upset about - I think about that comment. I’m lucky. It’s alright for some.

because, actually, being expected to know what to do with your life aged 15 is a fucking terrifying thing. we were kids at fifteen being told to make decisions as if we had all the facts, as if we weren’t also being blindfolded and spun around in circles until we couldn’t stand. Do you do what your parents say? what you think you want to do? what your teachers say? do you just stay in education even though it’s not for you because your dream is stupid, or because you don’t have a dream like everyone else seems to? are you supposed to have a dream?

*it’s NOT a stupid thing to worry about*

particularly when? well, when your entire self worth equates to the things that you output, the things that you do. so just for a moment, put yourself in the shoes of all of these wonderful, dazzling, damaged, crazy kids with big dreams and big hearts, kids that are struggling right now and kids that are our future, and imagine that you’ve been told since you were old enough to read or speak or walk that you’re just so very clever

isn’t it just wonderful how clever you are? isn’t it just great how we never need to worry about you? you’re such an easy child, it’s a blessing. always so considerate, so thoughtful, never making a fuss! isn’t it just fantastic how well you do in school? I can’t imagine what it must be like to have a child who went to all of those nasty parties. you’re so dedicated

raise your hand if you were only ever told you were good. raise your hand if you were never told you were kind.

so, what happens? you take a child, and you tell them for its entire childhood that they’re clever. You don’t tell them that they’re creative, or hard-working, or dedicated, or driven, or helpful. You let them know that it’s ok that they’re weird, because they’re going to be successful. what do you think parents say to their kid who’s crying because she has no friends and she doesn’t understand what the other children are thinking and why they would hurt each other like that? even good parents, the very best of them, say things like: you’re just more mature than they are. it doesn’t matter. keep your head down - you’ll show them.

your child, in the best case scenario, has access to her hyperfixation that makes the world big and bright and beautiful. she’s a bit weird, but it’s kind of cute. anyway, she’s good at it. and as long as she succeeds, conventionally, and you get to brag, then it’s ok that she’s a little bit unconventional.

and then things to break, just a little. and then, aged eleven, your child is having an asthma attack in the classroom because she got so anxious she couldn’t answer a maths question she couldn’t breathe. it’s ok, her parents tell her the next day. you’re just not good at maths - that’s alright. you don’t have to be good at everything

your child, because she’s perceptive, begins to realise that things don’t get better as you get older. people are just as cruel at 12 as they are at 7, and they’ll be just as cruel at 15. and then one day, as a bad joke because she doesn’t really understand humour, she writes a fake text to her dad from someone’s phone in legalese that actually has a secret code hidden it in that she knows her dad will crack right away because he’s brilliant. she thinks it’s hilarious. her father thinks he is being threatened, and spends the next week in meltdown, bedridden and burnt-out. and when she owns up, he turns and snaps at her, and says as if you could write something like that. an ADULT wrote this, not a fucking child

and suddenly, that cleverness they kept talking about? they don’t even understand that.

suddenly, no one sees her at all.

she needs to learn to be like the other kids. to be like a fucking child. and while she’s learning, she doesn’t speak for a year

that happened to me, but take your pick - I’m sure you don’t have to look far to find examples of your own.

My point is this: if you tell a child for their entire life that the only thing that is worthy of being loved is what they achieve, if every time they do something they love you tell them oh, you could be a famous writer! you’re so talented! rather than saying that you loved listening to their story, if you only praise them when they’re good and quiet and convenient and tell them that as long as they succeed, it doesn’t matter if they don’t have friends or if they’re miserable, and THEN you tell them to choose ONE THING and drop 90% of everything that makes them who they are -

what the hell did you THINK was going to happen??

because here’s the first thing. for many kids, whether that’s because of neurodivergence or age maturity or whatever, hyper fixations and hobbies aren’t just things they like to do. THEY ARE LIFELINES. they’re the things these kids go to when they’re hurt, angry, upset, because they make sense. for many kids, especially but not always girls, they are able to camouflage themselves and mask tendencies of neurodivergence because they’re ‘good students’. at a family gathering once, my mum, so frustrated at my inability and lack of desire to talk to any members of my extended family, snatched my German grammar book and locked it in the boot of the car. knowing that I escape and read it in the toilet was the only thing keeping me going, exhausted and stressed and overwhelmed. I vomited on the grass.

and here’s the second thing. you tell us from an early age that they only way we’ll ever be acceptable to the rest of society is if we succeed. autistic kids are fine, as long as they’re international maths olympiad champions. adhd kids are fine, as long as they’re famous athletes. if you’re obsessed with musicals that’s ok, as long as that obsession leads to a well-paying job as a successful writer on Broadway.

and then you tell us that we only have one chance at that success? and this decision determines the rest of our lives? and that we had so much potential when we were kids, and we better not waste it now? that not everyone is so lucky to be able to choose between so many things??

because being asked to choose between these things isn’t being asked to choose a hobby. when the only way anyone else defines you positively is by your success in one area, that becomes your entire identity.

so no, we’re not being too sensitive when you ask us to pick and choose what career, or what hobby to take forward. you’re not asking about hobbies. you’re asking us to choose what kind of person we want to be. you’re asking us to choose the most impactful way we can give back to the world, because we can’t waste those god-given talents. you’re asking us to figure out, still a child and hopelessly lost, what our purpose on this planet is. and you’re looking at us as if the ways that we survived all of these years, the things we clung to for comfort, are things we can just cast aside without further thought

ask me now, and I’ll tell you that’s not the way things work. we have second chances and third ones and tenth ones, we can be different things to different people and we can do different things at different parts in our lives, and be successful in different areas. life isn’t a fucking flowchart. and I’m still trying to come to terms with all the things I could have been, and my freak-outs about ‘wasted potential’ are so clockwork I could plan my calendar around them, but I’m beginning to understand that life doesn’t end when you’re twenty, or when you haven’t written a best-seller by eighteen. you have time.

but at fifteen? at fifteen, that question broke me.

do you know what you can do instead? you can show a little thoughtfulness. you can be kinder, and lead by example, and praise your kids when they’re kind too. when your son runs to you and shows you what you think is a better picture than you - a stick figure artisan, if you say so yourself - could ever create, you can actually just say you really like it. you can ask him if that’s him and daddy and the dog on a cloud. describe the picture back to him, and engage with this thing he’s made from his imagination - tell him the clouds he’s drawn are so big and fluffy and white, and ask if there are giant spiders living there. you know how to shut a child up? tell them yes dear, it’s wonderful. don’t be that person. promote your kid’s creativity - ask questions, have fun, play with this thing they’ve made - and not destroy it

when your daughter comes to you and shows you a song she’s written, don’t tell her she’s so talented or that she could be a musician one day. just sing along. ask her why she wrote it, and what she was thinking of when she did. ask her if she could make it different for two people singing it at the same time.

and if your child just really, really loves maths? let them do maths. it’s ok if their interests are stereotypical - as long as they love it and it’s fun, supporting them is wonderful. the best present my father ever got me was five hours of tutoring - an introduction to linguistics!! - when I turned twelve, starting on my birthday at 8am. I had never felt so understood and so loved.

as much as these simple things can destroy someone’s life, can stop them talking for a year, you have the chance to be that one voice of kindness that is a friend where a young person needs it most.

for me, this was the Bus Lady. I never knew her first name because I forgot immediately and was too embarrassed to ask again, but we got the bus together for two years right before I applied to university - she was a trainee teacher at my school. she saw that I missed tutor group and sat in the corridor every morning writing, and that I ran laps for an hour every lunchtime instead of sitting alone. but she came and sat with me one morning and asked what I was doing; I was developing a new shorthand and told her so warily.

she didn’t raise her eyebrows or say wow, that’s...that’s amazing. instead she frowned and looked at me skeptically and said ‘But why would you do that? There are plenty of functional shorthands out there - what does your shorthand have that they don’t? Tell me about it.’

I had no idea what to say

this was the first time anyone had actually ENGAGED in any capacity with what I was doing. and just like that, just by treating me seriously and asking valid questions and pointing out inconsistencies, I was a person who happened to have an idea that was in some serious need of questioning, and not a freak

there’s no way she remembers that interaction; she’s been a teacher now for year and probably doesn’t even remember who I am. But I had been this close to not going to university, to not bothering, and she made me stop, and wait a moment

she will never know the difference that that conversation and two months of kindness on the bus from a stranger made in my life.

so let’s be kind to each other, please. let’s be forgiving. let’s challenge each other and let’s engage with kids with special interests and listen to them talk. and so to any educators or teachers or parents or even other kids, I want to say - let’s treat our words seriously and with respect, like we treat our children, because they have immense capacity to hurt, because they can be used for good.

to any other fifteen year olds in a similar position, I just want to say: none of us here on tumblr have properly sorted our lives out, but I promise you it does get so much better.

you’re not too sensitive. you’re not a freak. you’re not only acceptable because you succeed. I know if you’re masking you feel you have to and it’s for survival, and I’m sorry, because you shouldn’t have to. and you should never, never have to think that you ‘have it good’ or that you’re lucky and are not allowed to hurt. there’s always some one who has it worse, and you can’t stop beat yourself up about that. fuck anyone who tells you otherwise. if you have gone through trauma, if you have unhealthy coping mechanisms, if you are depressed or anxious or otherwise mentally ill and some of it stems from this, I am so very very sorry. but you will be ok, even if you can’t write for a couple of years, or even if things change. you’ll get there. speaking as someone who is now writing for the first time in six years, drawing for the first time in longer, it’s scary and new and weird, but you will come out the other side.

and you do work hard. and you are creative. and you are loved. and you are so very, very kind.

*rant over*

#neurodivergence #neurodivergent #adhd #autism #giftedness #gifted kids #tag for this fucking awful school system?#neurodivergent kids #parenting #education #long post #meichenxi rants #mental health #trauma #depression #anxiety #mental illness #sorry for the scary tags I don't mean the post to be scary I'm just annoyed #and it got longer than I thought it would

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parkmuse · 5 years ago

Text

Not So Honest (M)

Word Count: 9322 (Reposted) (Wonhopes Masterlist)

Jungkook has got a pretty BIG problem, and he desperately asks you for your help.

cr.

Ding dong! Ding dong! Ding dong! Dingdongdingdongdingdon-

You let out a heavy sigh, pausing your show as you get up from the couch to answer the door. That annoying repetitive doorbell rings could only come from one person.

“YAH! Where’s your fucking keys you brat-“ You stop mid-sentence from yelling at him because your eyes catch onto the large package he’s struggling to hold along with a mountain of grocery bags in his hands.

“Yeah, I forgot them this morning and remembered once I was at the store. By the way, this was at the doorstep-“ You immediately snatch it out of his grasp, twirling around as you let go of the door and let it slam back in his face. You run to the table, squealing as you set it down to try and go look for something to open it with. “My package arrived!”

You hear the front door rattle a few times before its shoved open again, him struggling to get all the bags in as he forces the door closed with a bang. “What the fuck Y/N? And I don’t even get a thank you for picking that up for you?”

“I didn’t ask for your help, Jungkook,” You replied, waving him off before you walked back over to your package.

You’ve been waiting a whole two weeks for another one of these Amazon packages. You did a little contract with some sellers there that you would test out their products for free and give your honest review in return that you get free samples of the items. So far you’ve gotten blenders, make up, wireless head phones, even a decent cellphone all for free. And all you had to do was type up a quick, honest review with the pros and cons of the product that took less than 5 minutes, then you could enjoy all your free shit. Did I say free already?

“What’s in the package? Another crappy phone?” Jungkook yells from the kitchen, placing all the food in their designated locations. You let out another heavy sigh before responding to him. “Why do you care? Go hangout with Jimin and suck each other’s dicks or something.”

“You’re just jealous cause I could probably get more dick or actually scratch that, any dick at all compared to you if I really wanted to.” You shot him a glare and he smirks, then sticks his tongue out before placing the milk in the fridge.

God, you hated that brat. You’ve hated him for so many years, basically all of your life since you’ve known each other since elementary. Your parents were great friends so you always had to hang out with him when you would go to each other’s houses, dealing with him pulling your hair and stealing all your food and toys from you almost three times a week. Once you hit high school you were even forced to baby sit him even though you were only two years older, but his parents baby him so much and think he’s not fit to stay alone in his own damn home that they’d throw him over at yours.

Even now, as two damn grown adults you are still stuck with him, forced to share an apartment since you two go to the same college because his parents don’t trust him alone or with strangers. It was a living nightmare since you basically had no privacy with this brat, always meddling in your stuff and your life and him walking out of his room practically naked every damn day. Sure, he’s grown up really well, and he’s always been cute I guess, but holy hell he gets on your nerves so much he’s lost the on chance that you would ever find him attractive. The only upside to this is that you get help paying rent, but honestly you think you’d rather live on the streets than be with this annoying kid.

At least your annoyance will be at its minimal today, too excited to let him cloud your day when you got more cool free shit-

“What the fuck?” You spit, eyes bugged and jaw dropped once you comprehend exactly what Amazon just sent to you.

“What? Another flip phone or some shit- woah,” Jungkook’s eyes widened as well once he peeks over your shoulder to see what the big deal was.

Sex toys.

Not one, not two.

A whole box full.

There were different kinds of toys like vibrators and silicone dicks in all the colors you could possibly imagine. You didn’t even know what half the shit in that box was either; there were weird looking eggs to obscure shaped things you assumed were supposed to replicate a dick but had an extended side that you couldn’t figure out what it was actually intended to do. You pulled out a box and on the cover read Sassy Anal Beads in fancy cursive lettering, finally making you lose your patience.

“Why the fuck would they send me this shit!?” You huffed, tossing the stuff back in the box. You had no use for any of this. Sure, they could keep you company since you were single as hell but you really wished they would have sent you something way more useful.

“Maybe they knew you needed it— OW!” Jungkook yelps as you punch him in the chest. He pouts as he clutches onto his pecs but you just roll your eyes.

“Shut up, you deserved it.” You walk back to the couch and plop on it with a sigh, resuming your TV show.

“Aren’t you supposed to review all this shit?” He says, digging through some more of the box as he pulls an unrealistic sized purple dildo.

“I’m not going to bother. I’ll just say they were all shitty or something,” You say as you bring your feet up to the coffee table.

“Well that’s not really fair. You have to give your honest opinion. What if King Cock Deluxe deserves five stars?” He snickers, waving it over in front of your face.

You scrunch your face in disgust, “Stop being gross.”

He laughs and tosses it back in the box, then pulls out another item. “What the hell is this thing?”

You see him examining it in his hands, his face scrunching up in confusion. It was small and black, a ring attached to the end and the top having two protruding bumps.

You’ve actually heard of that one before from one of your girl friends who was gushing all about it. It was a rabbit designed cock ring, the two ends from the top was actually a vibrator so when you had sex the “rabbit ears” would stimulate your clit. Your friend said although it looked really ugly it really did the trick, but her boyfriend never liked using it because it was way too tight on him.

“It’s a cock ring,” You said unamused, standing up to walk over to the kitchen.

“Cock ring?” Jungkook responded, still sounding confused as ever.

“Did I stutter?” You said, digging through the pantry.

“Does it make you feel really good or something?”

You turn back to face him so you can yell at him for asking so many questions, but stopped once you saw his face. He was still looking at the toy, examining it in his hand intensely.

A small smile crept on your lips, and you’re glad he was still too focused on the toy in his hands to see. “Yeah Jungkook, it makes you feel real good.”

He looks up at you with wide eyes, but quickly replaces his surprise with a lazy smirk. “Yeah right, this free shit would never work.” He tosses the toy back into the box.

You snicker at his response. How has he never heard of a cock ring? Was he that inexperienced? Jungkook’s a grown man, but you’ve always seen him as the little brat next door. “I mean, I heard that got a lot of positive feedback for being one of the best sex toys out there. Men go crazy about it,” You chimed in, continuing to tease him.

“That piece of rubber? Bullshit.” He walks back into the kitchen, throwing some more groceries into the fridge. After a couple of minutes of silence and fixing up the kitchen, Jungkook speaks up again.

“I mean, what does it even do? How is it that good?”

“I don’t know, but must be pretty amazing.” You were getting kind of tired of your little white lie, and his constant repetitiveness of the topic was staring to annoy you. Before he was about to speak up again you interrupted him.

“Jungkook! I told you to buy some more damn cereal!” You whack him on the back of the head and he groans.

“I got most of the stuff on the list!” He pouts.

“You had one job kid, and now we got milk and no cereal.” You huff, walking over to grab your purse. “I always have to do things on my own around here. I’ll be back in a bit.” You grab your keys and walk out the door.

You finally made your way back home after being stuck in traffic for a good thirty minutes just for some cereal. Damn that Jeon kid for forgetting one measly thing.

You were starving since you hadn’t eaten since breakfast, and you were too lazy to cook anything so why not just have some cereal? You walk to the kitchen to pull out a bowl, opening the box of Frosted Flakes and filling it up to the brim. You walk over to the fridge to grab the milk, opening the door. You were met with nothing but water bottles on the top shelf and some groceries at the bottom. Confused, you looked all over the sides and in the drawers. There was a whole carton before you left and now it disappeared!

Then it clicked in your head. Your eyebrows crinkled and you let out a heavy sigh, closing the fridge. “JUNGKOOK!”

That damn kid always brings the carton of milk into his room, sometimes drinking it straight out of the container. You hated sharing food with him for this very reason, and you should really get him to stop drinking that shit because he’s getting way too big for his own good.

You waited for a good minute just to give him mercy, but by now he should have answered you, walking out of his room with a yeah, yeah as he brings the carton back out.

But there was complete silence.

You groan, walking down the hall to where your bedrooms were. He better have a good ass explanation for why he hasn’t answered you by now. You twist the knob and roughly push the door open. “Where’s the fucking milk Jungkook?!”

You pause at the door, making eye contact with a seemingly alarmed Jungkook. He’s sitting on the edge of his bed faced away from you, shirtless again, head turned with his eyes wide and his mouth slightly ajar. He looks like a deer in the headlights, his hand clutching onto the sheets crumpled beside him.

“You’re just sitting there doing nothing but didn’t bother answering me?” You thought it was a little weird, but quickly brushed it off.

“Um—well, I—“ Before he can give you an explanation, your eyes catch the item you were looking for at the night stand beside where he was sitting.

“There it is, I fucking knew it!” You strode over to the carton.

“NO! DON’T COME HERE!” He hollers, causing you to stop in your tracks.

“Whoa no need to yell, what’s on your dick?”

“N-NOTHING! Just…go to the store and get more! This is my milk!”

You could have sworn you felt a vein pop out of your temple at his remark. “I just came from the damn store! That’s a brand new carton! And my milk your ass I paid for that!”

You were seriously getting tired of him. When will you finally be able to get away from him? 5 years? 10 years? Are you really going to have to spend the rest of your life with this brat?

You don’t even know why you’re listening to him at the moment. You can do whatever you want, he can’t stop you. You continue to make a beeline to your milk, running past him to grab it and run out. Your feet catches onto his blanket, causing you to trip over and onto the floor in front of him with a loud thump.

You groan on the floor, pushing the sheet off of you and sitting up as you rub your head. You turn your head to look at a mortified Jungkook, completely colorless as he stares back at you in complete fear and embarrassment. Confused, you were about to ask what his problem was but your eyes flicked south.

A mere inches from your face was his dick in his hand, semi hard and just…all out there. What definitely made your jaw drop was that right at the base was a familiar looking object, black with bunny ears sticking out at the top.

You covered your mouth, embarrassed to have caught him in the act but also trying so hard not to laugh in front of his face because you cannot believe he’s actually doing this.

“Y/N, I-I can explain-“

You get up on your feet and grab the milk from the night stand, walking straight to the door avoiding eye contact with him. “No need to Kook, pretty self-explanatory. You have fun with that!”

You just wanted to get out of there as quick as possible before it could get even more awkward, but he calls out to you, making you stop.

“No wait! Don’t go! I-Um…”

“If you think I’m going to sit here and watch you jack off you have another thing coming-“

“NO! It’s not that! Why the fuck would I ask you that? I’m not some sicko.”

“Says the one with a bunny cock ring on his dick-”

“OKAY! You got me there,” He sighs. “But I was just curious! What was so good about this piece of plastic? And then I put it on a-and…”

“And what?” It probably didn’t feel good as he expected it to. Hell, it’s supposed to be the complete opposite.

“Well, it’s kind of…kind of stuck.”

A few seconds of silence pass as you comprehend what he just said, then you burst out laughing. He jumped in his seat, surprised by your reaction but then gives you a glare and a pout. “Why are you laughing?!”

You grab onto your sides, tears coming out of your eyes. You just can’t control yourself. This dumb kid has a sex toy stuck on him and he can’t get it off.

“Y/N!”

“I’m sorry! It’s just so…so hilarious. Wow.” You wipe the tears from your cheeks as the last bits of chuckles come spewing out.

“It’s not funny! It won’t come off…a-and it really hurts.”

You can hear the pain in his voice and for a second you actually felt bad for him. Maybe you shouldn’t have teased him that much.

But then again, he deserves it.

“Well, seems like you got a real problem on your hands. I’ll leave ya to it.” You say as you start walking out the door.

“Y/N WAIT! You have to help me!”

You turn back to face him, your brows knitting in confusion. “And why do I have to do that?”

“Please Y/N, you know I wouldn’t ask you if I didn’t mean it.”

You stare at him for a moment, taking in his facial features. You were a couple of feet away from him but from there you could see the tears threatening to fall from his big doe eyes. His bottom lip was caught between his teeth, probably to stop it from quivering in front of you. His broad shoulders visibly shook, and you sigh. He must really be in pain.

“Please, Noona.”

Your eyes widened in surprise, taken aback by his response. He hasn’t called you Noona for years. The last time he called you that was years ago, during a small phase where he was actually really sweet and nice to you. You actually loved that Jungkook back then, but then he went a full 180 on you and went back to being a brat.

You bite your lip, contemplating on what to do. He winces in pain and lets out a long drawn out whimper, which immediately shot to your core. What the fuck?

You don’t know what overcame you but you had the sudden urge to touch him.

What the hell were you thinking?

You just want to help him, that’s all.

You let out a heavy sigh, then placed the milk on the TV stand, proceeding to walk over to him. “Fine, let’s just get this over with. I don’t want your parents to blame me for not watching you and you coming home dickless.”

His eyes light up in admiration for you, excited to finally be free of this dumb torture-like pleasure free device. You stop in front of him, sitting on your knees as you push his legs apart to get a better look.

Surprisingly, Jungkook didn’t have a micro penis like you thought he had all these years. It was actually really, really generous, probably one of the biggest you’ve seen. No wonder this kid had a big ego.

“Alright, let’s see what we got.” As awkward as this was supposed to feel, it didn’t feel as weird as you thought it would. Why did it feel normal to be on your knees in front of Jungkook’s dick? You honestly didn’t want to think about why other than the fact that you’ve known him all your life and being naked in front of each other probably isn’t a big as a deal as you would imagine. You guys used to bathe naked all the time; that counts for something right?

“Wow Kook, you got it lodged pretty good. How the fuck did you get that all the way up there?” You stared at the small device, tightly clenching the base of his shaft.

“I-I thought it was supposed to hurt in the beginning, and then it would feel good later. That’s how sex is for girls, right?”

You snorted. “Does it look like you have a vagina, Jungkook? I mean maybe you will after your dick falls off-“

“Stop!” He whines, pouting at you. “Don’t say that! I would die without my dick.”

“That actually sounds like a good plan, maybe we should leave it then-“ He grabs your hands in his, squeezing them tightly as you were about to sit up again.

“Y/-Noona, please, please help me. I’ll be good to you from now on. I won’t be a brat anymore if you help me. Just…please.”

He softly caresses the back of your hand, looking at you again like a lost puppy.

Was Jungkook really being obedient right now? He seems like he would do anything for you, listened to anything you said. He seemed so…submissive.

You unintentionally licked your lips, but immediately came back to your senses. It was really getting hot in here and your hands were starting to sweat.

You ripped your hands away from him. “Okay, okay. Jeez.” You played it off like you weren’t phased by what he said and his sudden new name for you. You just needed to get this shit off of him and then you could finally eat. Starving yourself is definitely not good for your head.

You take in a deep breath, then reach for him. You didn’t want to bother addressing the elephant in the room, the surprisingly pretty big elephant in the room, because you didn’t want to make this even more awkward as it is. Asking if you could touch his dick would probably make this situation even worse, so you’re just gonna do what you need to do.

You grasp onto the base of his shaft where the toy is, tugging it forward in attempts to take it off.

“OW!” Jungkook yelps, grabbing your wrist. “You’re hurting me!”

“I barely even touched you brat, suck it up.” You whip your hand away from him, bringing it back to the toy.

He really got himself into a real mess here. There’s barely any space between the toy and his dick. Did he really think this wasn’t going to happen?

You attempt to pull at it again while your hand rested on his abdomen. You didn’t expect Jungkook’s abs to be so defined and rock solid under your fingertips, but you quickly brushed the thought away while you focused on the situation at hand.

When you pulled, the toy stayed put and your hand ended up grasping through the rest of his length to the tip, leaving you empty handed. You cupped the toy again, firmly pressing against his stomach while you pulled again, only to bring your hand against him again without the toy. You hear him whimper under your touch but again you don’t let it get to you, thinking he’s just being a little wuss about the pain again. After another attempt of tugging it off and your hand unintentionally grasping his length, you accidentally squeeze the end of his tip, feeling the warmth on your fingertips.

All of a sudden Jungkook lurches forward, putting a hand on your shoulder and squeezing tightly. His face is a few inches away from yours, his heavy pants tickling your face.

“Noona,” He chokes out.

You look up at him to see his adam’s apple bob, licking his partly chapped lips as he lets out open mouthed pants while his other hand clutches the bed sheet. You could see him breaking a sweat down his temple, looking so fucking hot for some strange reason but then something breaks your thoughts.

You feel a pulse under your touch, and you realize you’re still grasping his tip. You look down to see his dick erect, the tip partly red as you slowly feel the palm of your hand get wet. You slowly open your hand to see pre-cum leaking from his tip, some smeared along your hand.

You instantly get red, looking back up at Jungkook with the best glare you could muster up at the moment when in reality you’re freaking out and heating up inside. “What the fuck Jungkook!?”

You were about to stand up to leave when he grabs you again. “I-I’m sorry! I can’t help it!”

“You’re gross!” You try to rip your hand away, but he keeps a firm grip.

“Y/N I’m sorry! Your hand just feels really, really soft…please, just help me get it off!” He pleads. “I’ll do anything Y/N. I promise!”

You look back at your hand covered in Jungkook’s residue, groaning at the sticky substance. You hate to admit that you loved the fact he got like that because of your hands, because of you touching him. You grab the blanket off the floor and wipe your hand, not wanting to think about it. You gulp once you face him again, his cock looking bigger than before and a bit more constricted against the toy.

You press your fingertips against the toy, attempting to twist it off of him. He whimpers, eyes shut tight as you can’t help but notice his stomach clench against your touch again.

“Noona, please...” He says again in what was like a husky whisper, sounding like he’s begging for you. The high pitched whine that came after striked right at your core, causing you to bite your lip. Your stomach was doing somersaults as you tried so heavily to focus on getting this damn toy off of him, but he was making this so, so hard. No pun intended.

You tried whatever you could, pushing it upwards and to the side and downwards, but none of it seemed to be working.

“I think we need to get some oil or something and maybe it’ll slip off,” You thought. “I’ll go get some in the kitchen.”

“You won’t find any,” He said hesitantly.

“What do you mean? I thought you just bought some?”

“I…was that on the list too?” He looks at your warily, biting his bottom lips as he slowly cowers away.

Your eyes turned to slits as your brows crinkled in distress again, letting out a long, slow sigh. “Well, I can’t think of anything else.”

“Why don’t you spit on it?” Your eyes bugged out while you looked at him like crazy woman. What did he just say?

“What?” You say, looking at him incredulously.

“Well, water isn’t going to work. We don’t have anything else and that’s all I could think of.”

“Do it yourself!” You yell, red as a tomato at what he just actually asked for you to do.

“I can’t! My hands are too big! Your hands are perfect and it’s easier if someone else does it. I’ll just hurt myself. Please, just do it it’ll work!” He pouts at you again, biting his bottom lip as he shifts uncomfortably on the bed. “You’re so gentle Noona. Help me,” He begs.

You know his words weren’t supposed to sound dirty in any way, but god why do you keep thinking like that?

Your empty stomach was messing with your head. Not only was your head throbbing, but you can’t ignore the ache between your legs either. You thought of just telling him to fuck off and leave him there to figure it out himself, but he speaks up again.

“It really hurts…I’m begging you Y/N,” He whimpers, whispering your name with a groan at the end. You notice his uneven breaths as his stomach vibrates, his veins protruding along his arms as he still clenches the sheets, the other hand holding onto his hard cock. He grasps himself, letting out a high pitched whine as he grits his teeth, seeing his eyes water yet again from his action.

You gulp at the sight of him before you, so helpless and vulnerable that causes your core throb even more.

You press your thighs together to ease the tension. You don’t know why such a helpless Jungkook was turning you on uncontrollably, and you’d love to see how much more he could beg and sob under your touch if he’d allow you to.

You shake your head, pulling yourself out of your crazy thoughts. This is getting really bad and you knew you had to get away from him quick. You needed this to be over as soon as possible.

“Fuck, okay! But we’re never fucking talking about this again. This never happened,” You say as you kneel in front of him again. You bring a hand to your face, spitting into it and smearing it along your palm. You cup the base of his shaft and glide your palm around the skin near the toy, trying to lubricate it as much as you can.

“It’s not enough Y/N, just spit directly on it,” He groans. You were going to yell at him for telling you what to do, but spared him once you saw his flushed and pained expression. You silently obeyed, sitting up so your face hovered over his dick. You collected enough saliva in your mouth and spit on the skin below the toy, letting the liquid slip down and over his cock. You bring your fingertips to massage the area, spreading your fluid as much as you can over him. Once you think it’s enough, you try pulling the toy again but it still didn’t budge.

“I-I think you still need to add more,” He pants.

“You think I got gallons worth Jungkook? That I’m a human sprinkler?” You spew.

“Well how about you just use your mouth?” He said nonchalantly.

You gaped at him, about to tell him off but then he cuts you off. “It would be easier! You wouldn’t have to keep spitting and have it dry up. You can get it all over and then it would pop right off!”

Your patience was really wearing thin with this kid. But then he grabs you by shoulders, pressing his sweaty forehead against yours.

“You’re my only hope Noona. You can only help me with this. I’ll do whatever you want after I promise.”

“I swear I’ll be a good boy.”

Good boy?

Hearing that made the last strings of your sanity cut loose.

Fuck it.

You push him away by his chest abruptly, making him almost fall back on the bed. He caught himself before he could fall, hands flat against the bed. Before he could ask you what your problem was, you flatten your tongue along the base of his shaft.

“Y/N!” He moans aloud, bucking his hips up and into your face. You glide your tongue along his vein, swirling your tongue against his tip. You press an open mouthed kiss, then wrap the tip around the lips as you suck lightly.

“Oh fuck! Noona,” He rasps, trying so hard not to lose control and grab your hair to push you further into him. His moans egg you on and you tease his slit, earning another strangled moan of your name from him. Then you bring your mouth down onto his cock, taking him inch by inch.

You try your best to use your tongue, trying to wet every inch of his throbbing cock until you finally reach the base where the toy was. You hear him panting like he just ran a marathon above you, groaning as he watches your pretty lips around his thick member.

“Your mouth is so warm, it feels so good,” He groans, licking his lips before he gulps as he watches you intently. You stop your movements and look up to him, making direct eye contact. He looks at you in confusion, seeing the subtle glint in your eyes. Before he could say anything you swallow hard, causing him to thrash his head back and fist your hair.

“Fucking shit!” He moans, bucking his hips upward into you, causing the tip to hit the back of his throat. It hurt of course, but seeing the way he reacts to your ministrations was definitely worth it.

You pull your mouth off of him just until the tip, then bring him all into your mouth once again, sucking harshly.

“Holy fuck Y/N,” he moans, grasping the back of your head as you bob up and down his length.

“Keep fucking doing that.” You scratch his thighs, telling him that you’re the one in control instead of him before grazing your teeth slightly against his length. He whines in response, slightly nudging your hair back to stop you.

“Y-Y/N please…I’m sorry, just please keep going.” You release him with a pop, wiping the saliva from your chin as you look at him with a glare.

“Why are you telling me what to do? I thought you said you’d be a good boy?” You say as you slightly dig your nails into his massive thighs once again. “Or should I stop?”

“No! No please! Don’t stop I’ll be good I promise!” He whimpers at you, bringing his hand to your cheek to slowly caress your face.

“I’ll be good Noona.” You pretend to contemplate on your answer when you definitely weren’t going to leave him like this now, but you seem to think he’s had enough when you see his arm shake and his lips quiver.

“You better be.” You bring your mouth back to him, sinking your mouth down his hardened length as you take all of him again. You didn’t really think of Jungkook as the vocal type, but hearing him shamelessly moan and whimper your name aloud to the point the next door neighbors could hear heightened your ego tenfold.

You release him, bringing your hand up and down his shaft. You lift his dick so it’s against his stomach, about to run your tongue against him once again when you noticed something odd. A very thin line was visible on the cock ring, located on the bottom side of his dick. You bring your face closer to the line, looking at it curiously. Very small and slightly faint read the letters OPEN right above the line, in bold lettering.

Aha! You thought. Finally. Before you could bring your hand to the little slit, Jungkook calls out to you.

“Why did you stop? I’m being good Noona. Please, keep going.” He cries, and you swear it’s a tear that slips from his eyes and down his cheek than his sweat.

You lick your lips, looking back down at the toy then back at his cock.

He deserves this for being a brat all these years.

You look back up at him, giving him a sweet smile which felt seemingly odd to him. You never smiled like that at him. “Okay, since you’re being so good for me Kook,” You say sweetly.

“Why are you- fuck!” Jungkook groans when you take him all in one go, his tip hitting the back of your throat. You slightly gag, your mouth so full from his thick length but you push through it. You wanted to see this boy suffer.

You continue to go all out, hollowing your cheeks and deep throating him in the best ways possible, drowning in all his whines and cries of your name and how you were so fucking good.

“N-Noona, fuck, I think I’m gonna-“ You smile at his words.

Any second now.

At one particularly harsh suck he grabs your head, sinking you further down his cock as your mouth hits the toy. He moans at first but quickly cries in agony, fisting your hair harshly as you try to focus relaxing your throat.

“What…What the fuck…?” He whimpers, eyes squinting closed as he groans.

You release him with a pop, looking up at him with innocent eyes. “What’s wrong Kook?”

“I-There’s something wrong,” He says, grabbing his dick and wincing.

“Does it still hurt Jungkook? You want Noona to make you feel good?” You pull his hand away from him, grasping his length once again and pumping up and down slowly. He cries again, grabbing your wrist to stop your movements. “It fucking hurts Noona. What’s happening?” He sounded so lost, so helpless.

You never thought yourself to be a sadist but fuck, you loved it.

“Shh, Kookie,” You slowly rise to your feet, standing between his legs as you grab onto his shoulder. You bring a finger to his chin, lifting his head so he can look up to you. “Let Noona help you. I’ll make you feel real good.” With that, you pushed him harshly on the chest, causing him to fall back into the sheets. You quickly shimmy out of your shorts leaving you in your black lacy underwear, then turn back to him.

You lick your lips, staring at him sprawled on his bed looking so fucked out, completely naked. You climb up over him, bringing one leg over to straddle his waist.

“Y/N, what are you-“ You muffled him with a kiss, soft and sweet at first but slowly getting rougher to the touch as seconds go by. He moans when you bite his bottom lip, allowing you to delve your tongue into his hot cavern. His hands quickly find purchase on the soft flesh of your hips, holding you tightly. You suck on the tip of his tongue, earning you a groan.

You bring your mouth to his ear, nibbling his lobe before you whisper, “Just relax, Kook. And let Noona do all the work.”

You rise above him, your hands running along his arms as you meet his hands on your hips. You bring your hands to the hem of your shirt, quickly lifting it off of you and exposing your matching black lace bra.

“God damn,” he choked, eyes as wide as saucers as his mouth gaped at your beautiful figure. You chuckle at his response, then bring your hand down to your underwear. You rubbed yourself through the fabric, lightly moaning as you feel your juices seep through. You were definitely ready for him already. You use two fingers to hook your underwear, pushing it to the side while using your other hand to grab his dick.

He groans, watching your movements as you align yourself with his dick.

“Y/N, are you sure you- ahh!” His nails dig into your hips as you slowly sink onto him, your mouth slightly ajar as he fills you up perfectly.

His length and girth is the perfect size for you, filling you up to the brim as you settle perfectly onto his cock. You moan once your ass meets his thighs, sitting still as you adjust to the new found fullness.

Then, you move. You bring yourself off of him until just the tip is left, then sit back down with a slap. You moan at the sensation, but Jungkook is crying from your action.

“Holy f-fuck! Fuckkk,” He whimpers, chest heaving as you bring yourself up only to come down with another harsh slap. You continue these movements until you set a steady pace, bouncing on his length.

“Y/N! Oh my god, fuck, fuck Noona,” He writhes below you, looking like he’s about to lose his mind as he twists his head back and forth with his eyes tightly shut.

“You feel so fucking good, god, keep going please,” He whines, continuously licking his lips as his mouth constantly lets out a string of profanities and whimpers.

“Am I making you f-feel good, Kook? Ah, fuck,” You groan, speeding up your pace as the room fills with constant slap, slap, slaps.

“Yes yes yes, fuck yes, you’re so fucking good, I’m losing my mind,” He chokes, bringing one hand to squeeze your ass while the other tightly grasps onto your upper thigh. You continue going hard against him, him hitting you so deep and in just the right spots. Every time you drop down you feel something hitting against your flesh, then you look down.

You forgot the cock ring was still stuck on him, then realize it was the bunny ears. Memories of your friend saying how good the vibrator was rushed into your head, then you bring one of your hands to the toy. You press the switch on the toy, the low buzz sounds filling the room along with Jungkook’s whines. Once you sink down onto him again the product lands right on your clit, vibrating at an inhumane speed which causes your eyes to roll back.

“Oh my fucking god!” You scream, pausing your movements as you let the vibrator run against your bundle of nerves. You’ve never felt anything like it before.

You attempt to squeeze your thighs together, slowly rotating your hips instead as you let the vibrations of the toy work its magic against you. You moan aloud again, throwing your head back as the feeling of Jungkook’s cock so deep inside you along with the toys ministrations make your mind go hazy. All of a sudden you feel Jungkook’s hips lurch forward, pounding into you from below as he holds you by the hips to keep you still.

“Jungkook!” You scream, scratching his chest with his hands as he takes over.

“Y-You’re getting tighter on me, fuck, you feel so fucking good,” He moans, filling you to the brim each time as the toy continues to rub against your clit.

You can’t contain your voice now, moaning nonstop as Jungkook keeps ramming into you, the toy helping you reach your high quicker than you ever thought possible. After a few more strokes you come undone, moaning loudly as you tightly clench Jungkook’s dick. He lets out a deep groan, continuously thrusting into you as you ride out your high.

“Y/N, Y/N, fuck fuck fuck, I’m gonna-“ Jungkook grabs onto your ass tightly, letting out a strangled moan. You watch as his head falls back into the bed, his stomach clenching tightly as he releases a choked sob. You felt his cock throb from within you, but no release. The side of your mouth twitches upward, but when you see his eyes fill with tears once again, him crying aloud, you finally actually start feeling bad.

You lift your hips, letting his hard cock slip out of you as you roll over beside him. You take a few seconds to catch your breath. You’re about to sit up to take the cock ring off of him but all of a sudden he rolls over to hover above you, spreading your legs open and pushing your panties to the side.

“Hey, what-“ He grabs his cock and roughly shoves himself into you again, causing you to throw your head back with a moan. He has his hands on either side of your head, then brings his mouth to your ears.

“You’re so fucking tight Noona, you feel so warm.” He grabs your hips as he starts pummeling into you, making your eyes roll back.

“You’re fucking hot as hell, you moaning my name and coming all over my cock,” He grunts, “You don’t know how many times I’ve came imagining what just happened. But why can’t I fucking come now?”

“J-Jungkook, stop,” You moan, trying to get him to stop so you can take the ring off of him. But he doesn’t let up, too focused on trying to reach his release as he fucks you harder, grunting and growling as he picks up his pace. The toy continues to buzz, occasionally rolling over your nub if Jungkook angles it the right way, causing you to yell out. He spreads your legs further, tossing one of your legs over his shoulder to reach into you deeper.

“That picture of you bouncing on my dick, fucking me, using me to make you feel good, I never imagined how fucking sexy you’d actually look. And the way you moan my name, fuck I’ll come just from thinking about that next time I touch myself,” He groans, reaching behind you to rip off your bra. His mouth latches onto your nipple, sucking your breast as you grab his head to bring him closer. He laps your nub, licking up the valley of your breasts and brings his lips to yours.

You moan into his mouth, allowing him to ravage you some more. He brings both of your legs around his waist and you cross them, shoving himself into you faster. At this angle the toy is hitting directly on your clit each time he pounds into you, making you scream out his name as you clutch the bedsheets beside you.

“Jungkook!” You moan his name like a mantra, your release getting closer and closer. He continues kissing you, and after a few more deep strokes you come all over him again, squeezing him so hard he yells your name aloud, his cock throbbing uncontrollably as you clench tightly around him. His hands are holding your hips so tightly you know there’s going to be bruises in the morning, but you don’t care. You move your hips against him as you embrace the waves of pleasure, panting as you finally go limp. You’re about to slowly doze off from being so tired, wiping the sweat along your temple when you hear another choked sob. Jungkook pulls out of you, his dick still hard and swelled. The tip looks painfully red, the rest of his shaft looking constricted as he whimpers again.

“I-I fucking can’t,” He cries, his cheeks red and wet with tears of frustration as he looks at you with pleading eyes.

“Oh Kook,” You bite your lip. Maybe you really went too far.

You crawl over to him on his knees, carefully touching his length. He winces at your touch, whimpering as you lift it up. You press the button to turn off the vibrations, then use your fingernail to dig into the slit of the toy, pulling it forward as it pops open. He groans in relief as you slowly drag the toy off of him, tossing it to the side.

“And that’s what you get for being a brat all these years.” You say as you plop onto his bed, grabbing the sheets to cover yourself.

“What?” He looks at you confused, then his eyes widen.

“Wait…you fucking knew?”

You chuckle, “Of course, who doesn’t fucking know what a cock ring does? It stops you from coming, Kook.” You shuffle onto your side, getting ready to fall asleep.

“So you fucked with me this whole time?” He said in a low tone, venom laced in his voice.

“Fucked and fucked,” You said. “You’ve always fucked with me all these years. I was just making it even. Also we’re not telling anyone about this, okay?” You pointed back and forth from yourself to him, then plopped back onto the pillow.

Silence filled the room and you accepted it with open arms. You were just completely exhausted at this point, not having really expected such a good fuck from Jungkook. But hey, he made you feel good and you got your revenge, so it all works out. You were slowly slipping off into dreamland but all of a sudden the sheets are ripped off of you. Your legs were pulled downward, dragging your head off the pillow.

“What the fuck-“ Jungkook grabs your waist and flips you over onto your stomach, pushing your head down into the mattress while your ass is raised in the air. You attempt to turn around to ask him what the fuck he thinks he’s doing, but you cry as a hard slap echos in the room.

He smooths his rough palm against your right cheek where he spanked you, then brings his hand once again over the spot making you choke.

“You think this is a fucking joke? Making me lose my fucking mind, not letting me come three times?”

“Let go brat-“

Slap.

“The girl of my fucking dreams comes in here and sucks me off, fucks me twice, yet I couldn’t even fucking enjoy it cause I was in so much pain? You know how fucking horrible that is?” He grabs your underwear, tearing it in half as he lets it fall on the bedspread.

“Jungkook-ahh!” You moan once he brings his hand to your core, running his fingers along your slit.

“You call me a brat all the time, yell at me, yet I do everything for you,” He says as he lets a finger slip in, pumping into you as your wet juices fall down your thighs. “But you didn’t even let me come once.”

“Jungkook I can’t, not anymore,” You whimper, fisting the sheets as he plunges a second finger into you.

“Oh you can’t? But you came so many times Noona. Fuck, I even called you Noona cause I knew you secretly loved that,” He grunts. “I hate saying that. But I did it for you, to make you feel good Y/N.”

“Please,” You beg, trying to move away from his touch. But he doesn’t let up, continuing to touch you.

“I think you can go again. You never do anything for me, so you can do this. I haven’t even come yet,” He drags his fingers out of you, then leans forward so his dick sat against your cheeks and his chest leaned against your back. He brings his fingers to your lips, prodding them at your entrance. “Suck.”

You complied, opening your mouth as you lapped up your juices on him. You hear him groan behind you, slowly rubbing his length against your ass.

“God, you’re so fucking hot.” He leans back, pumping himself a few times before he aligns his tip at your entrance. You were going to attempt to stop him again but he pounds right into you, causing your face to fall flat onto the sheets.

He immediately starts off rough and fast, holding you by the hips as he drags you to him, fucking you onto him. You mewl, so sensitive from the last two rounds that you didn’t have the strength to do anything.

“Fuck, you’re still so fucking tight,” He groans, “God, I imagined fucking you so many times before, but I never thought it’d feel this good.”

“Jungkook…” You moan, slowly feeling the coiling in your stomach return.

“All these years Y/N, having to deal with seeing you in those short shorts, those low tops, fuck, you were such a fucking tease,” His thighs slap harder against your ass.

“Did I ever tell you I walked in on you changing once? I fucking ran to my room and jacked off that entire night to that image.” You moaned in response, thinking about the thought of Jungkook touching himself, pumping his shaft hard and fast as he thought of you, moaning your name as he came. And he was only a couple of feet away from you in the other room.

“But I never did anything about it, because you always treated me as the little brat next door,” He growled, flipping you over so you were on your back, then pushing himself right back in.

“Tell me Y/N, do you still think of me as a kid?” He grabbed one of your breasts, kneading it as he sucked on the other. “Would some brat make you feel this fucking good?”

You moaned in response, grabbing his hair as you tried to pull him closer to you. He sucked harder, pinching your nub between his fingers as he continued thrusting you at a harsh pace. He let you go, rising up to adjust you again, hooking his arms around your thighs as he fucked you into his mattress.

“Fuck, Jungkook! Oh my fucking god,” You moan aloud, slightly arching your back as he drilled into you, making your body slowly inch upward and closer to the bedframe. The hinges squeaked uncontrollably, the bed frame hitting against the wall each time he thrusted into you.

The angle was causing you to see stars, his length hitting you in your deepest and most pleasurable spot.

“Fuck, I think I’m gonna-“

He immediately stops his movements, causing you to groan at the loss of your blissful release.

“Why the fuck did you stop!?” You yell, tears of frustration clouding your vision.

He smirks at you in return, leaning forward until his face is a mere inches from yours.

“I don’t think you deserve it. Why should I let you come again?” You try to move in response, but he still has his arms around your legs, keeping you in place.

“Please,” You beg, wanting nothing more than to just drown in euphoric feeling of letting go against him.

“How are you gonna make me?”

“I’ll do anything! I won’t call you brat anymore! Just please, let me come,” You whimper, bringing your hands to cup his face.

“Hmm…” He contemplates for a little while, then you whine another please before he chuckles.

“You’ll do anything?”

“Anything.”

“Will you be my girlfriend after this?”

Your eyes widen and your jaw drops, not expecting that request at all. You thought he’d want you to suck his dick again, which you wouldn’t mind. But girlfriend?

He grabs your hand into his, then slowly caresses his face into your touch. He turns his face to kiss the inside of your palm, then each of your fingertips.

“I’ve loved you since I was 7. You’re the only girl for me, and we’re practically going to be together for the rest of our lives cause of our parents. My parents don’t want me to be with anyone else either, so we already have their blessing.” He smiles at your speechless face, then brings himself forward to give you a kiss on the nose.

Butterflies fill your stomach, and you feel like you can’t breathe for a moment. This brat has been with you for so long you never realized you actually loved him too, and you wouldn’t know what you would do without him.

“So do I take that as a yes?” He says, peppering sweet kissing along your jawline.

You bite your lips, but slowly your mouth curves into a smile. “You’re such a greaseball.”

He chuckles, bringing his lips to yours. You wrap your arms around his neck, melting into his kiss.

“Okay not to ruin the moment but I’m kind of fucking dying here and I feel like my dick is going to fall off,” He groans, feeling him still hard within you.

You giggle, giving him one last kiss on the lips before moving away from him. “Where do you want to come?”

“Fuck,” He grunts, licking his lips as he contemplates.

“I want to come inside you.” You nod at his response, “That’s fine, I’m on the pill. And how do you want me?”

“On top.” You nod again, smiling at him as you lift yourself up, changing positions with him. He falls back on the sheets and groans while he watches you straddle him, lining his cock with your soaking entrance. Once again you sink onto him, allowing him to fill you up to the brim. Both of you sigh in content, him kneading your breasts and you holding onto his chest.

You quickly start bouncing on him, wanting him to have his relief as quickly as possible. He groans as your ass slaps against his thighs harshly every time you come down, eyes closed shut as his mouth hangs open. You clench against him, trying to milk him out for his release, and he moans your name louder. You feeling the throbbing occur and you know he’s close. You were so focused on trying to get him off that you didn’t realize Jungkook reached for the toy again, turning the power on as the slight buzzing filled the room. Your eyes pop open and you cry aloud once he presses the vibrator part of the cock ring against your clit, making you writhe above him.

“Oh fuck! Fuck, Jungkook, fuck,” You mewl, moving faster against him as he keeps the toy against your bundle of nerves.

“Come on Y/N, come for me babe. Come all over my cock,” He grunts, and after a few more seconds of the toy against you you let go, lurching forward as you throw your head against Jungkook’s chest, crying his name aloud. He grabs onto your hips and plants his feet flat on the bed, fucking you through your high, and after another half dozen strokes he chokes your name out, coming inside of you in long, hot spurts. Jungkook’s warmth felt nice inside you, and you continued moving as best you could until he finished, groaning as he slowly went limp inside of you.

Both of you were panting and you could feel his rapid heartbeat slow against your cheek. He brings a hand to brush through your hair, bringing a blanket to cover the both of you before wrapping an arm around your waist.

“I love you Y/N,” He said, kissing your temple.

“And I love sex toys now even though it hurt like a bitch, but at least it brought us together.” You slap his chest, causing him to let out a chuckle. “We should give it a 5 star review. The toy sucked ass for me but it also brought me this beautiful ass,” He said as he squeezed one of your cheeks. “Pretty great if you ask me.”

“You’re still dumb and a brat,” You said as you rested your chin on his firm chest, staring up at him. You leaned forward to kiss his bottom lip, right where his mole was that you always secretly adored.

“But honestly, I love you too.”

#jungkook #bts #fanfic #comedy #smut #notsohonest #wonhopes

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